[A man suspected his wife was seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective, Chen Lee, to watch and report any activities while he was gone. A few days later, he received this report...]
MOST HONOURABLE SIR:
YOU LEAVE HOUSE. I WATCH HOUSE.
HE COME TO HOUSE. I WATCH.
HE AND SHE LEAVE HOUSE, I FOLLOW.
HE AND SHE GO IN HOTEL.
I CLIMB TREE. I LOOK IN WINDOW.
HE KISS SHE. SHE KISS HE.
HE STRIP SHE. SHE STRIP HE.
HE PLAY WITH SHE. SHE PLAY WITH HE.
I PLAY WITH ME.
I FALL OFF TREE.
I NOT SEE.
Justice is truth in action. - Benjamin Disraeli
Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas
Generosity is the flower of justice. - Nathaniel Hawthorne
Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson
Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb
A flagrant violation of international law. - Unknown
A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler
If you want peace, you must work for justice. - Pope Paul VI
There's a strong criminal relement up there. - Archie Bunker
It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes
The worst form of injustice is pretended justice. - Plato
Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain
Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger. - Martial
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. - Martin Luther King Jr.
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire
The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. - William Shakespeare
Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx
Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown
The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb
What a cage is to the wild beast, law is to the selfish man. - Herbert Spencer
Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice. - H L Mencken
Sometimes justice is at its most merciful when it's blind. - Nancy Gibbs
Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem
My photographs don't do me justice – they just look like me. - Phyllis Diller
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. - Wayne W. Dyer
A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo
If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill
True friends don't judge each other, they judge other people together. - Unknown
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields
Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor
Tennis is like a lawsuit: activity from across the court is often surprising. - Unknown
It's every lawyer's dream to help shape the law, not just react to it. - Alan Dershowitz
I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny
Your mother's down there throwing a monkey wrench into the halls of justice. - Archie Bunker
The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand
On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle
Observe good faith and justice toward all nations. Cultivate peace and harmony with all. - George Washington
My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet. - Mark Twain
If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend. - St. Augustine
In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay
I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers
Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe
If we judge ourselves only by our aspirations and everyone else only their conduct we shall soon reach a very false conclusion. - Calvin Coolidge
In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams
We discern across the centuries a commanding and versatile intelligence, wielding with equal force the sword of war and of justice. - Winston Churchill
While there is a lower class, I am in it; while there is a criminal element, I am of it; and while there is a soul in prison, I am not free. - Eugene V Debs
Chinese Law School
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!
Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars
Move Over Car
King Kong vs Godzilla
I Love Thanksgiving
Tree of Dreams
2fer Sudoku Puzzles I
Transformer Fire - 'Spreading' The Risk