Do You Drive A Cataract?

Optometrist-required translation


A Japanese tourist went to a Canadian eye Doctor. After an examination, the Doctor said, “You have a cataract.”

The Japanese tourist shook his head. “Oh no. I have a Rincoln!”


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Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

When Irish eyes are smiling, watch your step. - Gerald Kersh

An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness. - Margaret Atwood

Music isn't for the eyes - it's for the ears. - Adele

Besmooch the family name in the eyes of the community. - Archie Bunker

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

I'm gonna keep a beagle-eye on you the whole weekend. - Archie Bunker

We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open. - Harry Edwards

Conjunctivitis dot com ... now there's a site for sore eyes. - Tim Vine

If a man puts out the eye of an equal, his eye shall be put out. - Hammurabi

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

I still close my eyes and go home... I can always draw from that. - Dolly Parton

If you want to lead the people, you must first speak to their eyes. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye. - Helen Keller

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. - Mark Twain

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world through the eyes of a child. - Ron Wild

Being born with a pair of beady eyes was the best thing that ever happened to me. - Lee van Cleef

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal. - Henry Ford

Whenever a man has cast a longing eye on offices, a rottenness begins in his conduct. - Thomas Jefferson

When you speak to a man, look on his eyes; when he speaks to thee, look on his mouth. - Benjamin Franklin

My eyes in tears
Heart never sighs
My mind never fears
I conquer the lies - Munia Khan

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but seeing with new eyes. - Marcel Proust

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily we do our eyes. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world. - George Santayana

Our eyes are placed in front because it is more important to look ahead than to look back. - Unknown

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. - William Shakespeare

The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

Men are born with two eyes but with one tongue, in order that they may see twice as much as they say. - C.C. Colton

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. - Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.

The key to a better life isn't always a change of scenery. Sometimes it simply requires opening your eyes. - Richelle E. Goodrich

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. - Mark 10:25

When hungry, eat your rice; when tired, close your eyes. Fools may laugh at me, but wise men will know what I mean. - Lin-Chi

That's the kind of luck poor Mr. Lincoln had the night he went to the movies, and he sat in John Wilkes' booth. - Archie Bunker

That old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind. The time is always right to do the right thing. - Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.

I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, 'Where? What?' and turn away. - Christina Rossetti

You must mind and not lower the Church in people's eyes by seeming to be frightened about it for such a little thing. - George Eliot

Anyone can make you smile or cry, but it takes someone special to make you smile when you already have tears in your eyes. - Unknown

What was most significant about the lunar voyage was not that men set foot on the moon but that they set eye on the earth. - Norman Cousins

You write to become immortal, or because the piano happens to be open, or you've looked into a pair of beautiful eyes. - Robert Schumann

Nothing contributes so much to tranquilize the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye. - Mary Shelley

No, I think that was when Abraham Lincoln signed the Declaration of Independence. Ya know, "Fourscore and 7 years ago." - Archie Bunker

When you hear people making hateful comments, stand up to them. Point out what a waste it is to hate, and you could open their eyes. - Taylor Swift

If a train is coming at you, closing your eyes won't save you... but if you look right at it, you at least have a chance to jump. - Andrew Vachss

I've never been able to grow an organ back," Lana said. "Last time I tried... Let's just hope you don't end up with whip eyes. - Michael Grant


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20-Jul-2018