Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
In doing we learn. - George Herbert

Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. - Groucho Marx

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

Life can be fun if you learn to enjoy the adventure. - Unknown

The day you stop learning is the day you begin decaying. - Isaac Asimov

You ain't gonna learn what you don't wanna know. - Jerry Garcia

I realized my mission in life was to learn more, not earn more. - Surya Das

There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm. - Willa Cather

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

We tend to steer our lives in the direction of the lessons we need to learn. - Don Campbell

Learning to let go of guilt and forgive yourself is part of emotional growth. - Unknown

Whoever wants to know the heart and mind of America had better learn baseball. - Jacques Barzun

Life is like playing violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on. - Samuel Butler

Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at. - Lyn Karol

Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer. - William S. Burroughs

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Sometimes when learning comes before experience it doesn't make sense right away. - Richard David Bach

The point was to learn what it was we feared more: being misunderstood or being betrayed. - Adam Levin

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in…it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

Everyone should experience defeat at least once during their career. You learn a lot from it. - Lou Holtz

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. - Doug Larson

The most beautiful thing in the world is, precisely, the conjunction of learning and inspiration. - Wanda Landowska

You really don't need to study how to change a diaper. As a new mom, you learn pretty darn quickly! - Ivanka Trump

Most people would learn from their mistakes if they weren't so busy trying to place the blame on someone else. - Unknown

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

You can only learn from the second-raters. The first-raters are out of range; you can't see how they get their effects. - Unknown

You don't learn to hold your own in the world by standing on guard, but by attacking and getting well hammered yourself. - George Bernard Shaw

Living in China has made me appreciate my own country, with its tiny, ethnically diverse population of unassuming donut-eaters. - Jan Wong

To make no mistake is not in the power of man; but from their errors and mistakes the wise and good learn wisdom for the future. - Plutarch

The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn. - Alvin Toffler

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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25-Jun-2019