My husband isn’t happy with my mood swings.
The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods.
When I’m in a good mood, it turns green.
When I’m in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.
Maybe next time he’ll buy me a diamond.
No pressure, no diamonds. - Mary Case
Big girls need big diamonds. - Elizabeth Taylor
I ain't in a happy frame of mood. - Archie Bunker
It ain't exactly the Pope diamond. - Archie Bunker
Menopause. A pause while you reconsider men. - Margaret Atwood
I ain't in no mood to play 120 questions. - Archie Bunker
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. - Confucius
Character is a diamond that scratches every other stone. - Cyrus A. Bartol
Diamonds are only lumps of coal that stuck to their jobs. - Malcolm Forbes
A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor
Menopause: you have to laugh or you'll end up crying. - Missa Says
I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown
It is better to have old second-hand diamonds than none at all. - Mark Twain
I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. - Emma Goldman
The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu
Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes
I do not want horses or diamonds - I am happy in possessing you. - Clara Schumann
Rappers wear diamonds to compensate for a lack of fashion sense. - Asap Rocky
A gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself. - Mae West
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
Proverbs are mental gems gathered in the diamond districts of the mind. - William R. Alger
Invest in the human soul. Who knows, it might be a diamond in the rough. - Mary McLeod Bethune
It's called MENOPAUSE for a reason... MEN should PAUSE before they speak! - Unknown
Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown
Life without endeavor is like entering a jewel mine and coming out with empty hands. - Japanese Proverb
I don't work out. If God wanted us to bend over, he'd put diamonds on the floor. - Joan Rivers
The most precious jewels you'll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children. - Unknown
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West
The problem with having a sense of humor is often that people you use it on aren't in a very good mood. - Lou Holtz
Writing is easy: All you do is sit staring at a blank piece of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead. - Gene Fowler
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
That terrible mood of depression of whether it's any good or not is what is known as The Artist's Reward. - Ernest Hemingway
Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown
From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe
Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown
No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine
I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene
The paradigm of treating menopause symptoms with the lowest effective dose of hormone therapy, for the shortest period necessary, is very sensible. - Hugh Taylor
Big girls need big diamonds. - Elizabeth Taylor
I ain't in a happy frame of mood. - Archie Bunker
It ain't exactly the Pope diamond. - Archie Bunker
Menopause. A pause while you reconsider men. - Margaret Atwood
I ain't in no mood to play 120 questions. - Archie Bunker
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. - Confucius
Character is a diamond that scratches every other stone. - Cyrus A. Bartol
Diamonds are only lumps of coal that stuck to their jobs. - Malcolm Forbes
A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor
Menopause: you have to laugh or you'll end up crying. - Missa Says
I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown
It is better to have old second-hand diamonds than none at all. - Mark Twain
I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. - Emma Goldman
The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu
Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes
I do not want horses or diamonds - I am happy in possessing you. - Clara Schumann
Rappers wear diamonds to compensate for a lack of fashion sense. - Asap Rocky
A gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself. - Mae West
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
Proverbs are mental gems gathered in the diamond districts of the mind. - William R. Alger
Invest in the human soul. Who knows, it might be a diamond in the rough. - Mary McLeod Bethune
It's called MENOPAUSE for a reason... MEN should PAUSE before they speak! - Unknown
Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown
Life without endeavor is like entering a jewel mine and coming out with empty hands. - Japanese Proverb
I don't work out. If God wanted us to bend over, he'd put diamonds on the floor. - Joan Rivers
The most precious jewels you'll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children. - Unknown
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West
The problem with having a sense of humor is often that people you use it on aren't in a very good mood. - Lou Holtz
Writing is easy: All you do is sit staring at a blank piece of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead. - Gene Fowler
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
That terrible mood of depression of whether it's any good or not is what is known as The Artist's Reward. - Ernest Hemingway
Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown
From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe
Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown
No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine
I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene
The paradigm of treating menopause symptoms with the lowest effective dose of hormone therapy, for the shortest period necessary, is very sensible. - Hugh Taylor
see also Relationiship & Shopping Sections
7 Dwarfs of Menopause
Menopause Sucks
 USB Vacuum Cleaner |  Ventilated Bridge |  Mexican Fire Extinguisher |  Latte Art |  Titanic's Non-Romantic Scene |
 Monkeying Around |  Fake News |  Winter Tires |  Geek Gravestone |  Polar Bear Attack |
 Corgideer |  Ice Hockey Meltdown |  Upended Water Buffalo |  Don't Count On It |  Feather Cleaning |
 Beard Fashion |  Tough Love |  GPS Marriage Proposal |  Bacon Reasons |  Icehenge |
10-Dec-2018 |