A Dog’s Worst Nightmare

Waking up to a cat-astrophe...



A Dog's Worst Nightmare in the Operating Room with Feline Medical Staff

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Good taste is the worst vice ever invented. - Edit Sitwell

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. - Charles Dickens

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself. - Mark Twain

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help get them back in bed again. - Will Rogers

At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. - Dale Carnegie

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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20-Feb-2019