Crochet Doll Collection

The secret of a happy marriage

Shoe box confession - prayer for understanding



A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything.
They had kept no secrets from each other except that the
little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that
she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.


For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but
one day the little old woman got very sick, and the Doctor said
she would not recover.

In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down
the shoe box and took it to his wife’s bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box,
and when he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack
of money totaling $95,000.

He asked her about the contents.

“When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me
that the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that
if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.”

The little old man was so moved - he had to fight back tears. Only
two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him
two times in all those years of living and loving.
He almost burst with happiness.

“Honey,” he said, “that explains the doll, but what about all of
this money - where did it come from?”

Crochet Doll Collection

“Oh,” she said, “that’s the money I made from selling the dolls.”




Patience Prayer

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him, and Patience for his moods;
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I’ll beat him to death,
Because I don’t know how to crochet.


QuotaBills
Every man over 40 is a scoundrel. - George Bernard Shaw

As I get older, I just prefer to knit. - Tracey Ullman

The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

Virtue was never as respectable as money. - Mark Twain

The best way to hold a man is in your arms. - Mae West

Truth is the highest thing that man may keep. - Chaucer

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

The man who has a full set of tools has no children. - Unknown

You have not converted a man because you have silenced him. - John Morley

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

Success will come to the side that has the last man standing. - Philippe Petain

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart. - Jonathan Swift

Patience has its limits. Take it too far and it's cowardice. - George Jackson

Poetry is the statement of a relation between a man and the world. - Wallace Stevens

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. - Oscar Wilde

The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it. - Woodrow Wilson

A billion here, a billion there - pretty soon it adds up to real money. - Everett Dirksen

The more money an American accumulates, the less interesting he becomes. - Gore Vidal

All this worldly wisdom was once the unnameable heresy of some wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book. - Ernest Hemingway

A speculator is a man who observes the future, and acts before it occurs. - Bernard Baruch

To tend, unfailingly, unflinchingly, towards a goal, is the secret of success. - Anna Pavlova

The most dangerous creation of any society is the man who has nothing to lose. - James Baldwin

What is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul? - Matthew 16:26

One can never speak enough of the virtues, the dangers, the power of shared laughter. - Francoise Sagan

Man's chief enemy is his own unruly nature and the dark forces pent up within him. - Ernst Jones

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

You can read Kant by yourself, if you wanted to; but you must share a joke with someone else. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

A man who gives his children habits of industry provides for them better than by giving them a fortune. - Richard Whately

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

I tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless. - Rodney Dangerfield

The man with the real sense of humor is the man who can put himself in the spectator's place and laugh at his own misfortune. - Bert Williams

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

A man should not live beyond the age when he begins to deteriorate, when the flame that lighted the brightest moment of his life has weakened. - Fidel Castro

Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it. - Barbara Ehrenreich

A wise man knows when to stay silent. However, a wiser man of faith knows that sometimes words can win the battle when all odds stand against you. - Shannon L. Alder


see also   Finance,  Marriage,  Relationship  &  Survivor  Sections
Nope, Didn’t See A Thing

 

Introducing the iPhone 20

Cell Phone Book

Bouncing Shoreline

HunchBach

Coffin Escape

Second Hand Work

Wet Tents

Rattle Spit

Bobbie Tickle

When The Chips Are Down

Lego Key and Charger Holder

Mice Home

Quad (Hyper) Sudoku

iPhone Sushi

Free Stuff

House Maid For Men

UnBralievable

Highest Human Position In The World

Husband Space

No-Elephant Building
Submissions by Diane BaughFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

29-May-2017