Q: How do they serve alcoholic drinks on Italian cruise ships?
A: On the rocks.
Q: What vegetables do you get with dinner on Italian cruise ships?
Q: What’s the fastest way to get off an Italian cruise ship?
A: Follow the captain.
Q: What did the captain of the ill fated Costa Concordia say when asked if he knew where he was going?
A: He replied, “off course.”
Q: Was the Costa Concordia the most expensive thing to go down in Italy?
A: Only since Berlusconi’s last hooker.
Q: What’s the difference between the Italian economy and the stricken cruise liner Costa Concordia?
A: Nothing - The bottoms dropped out of both.
Italy is a geographical expression. - Prince Metternich
I hope my ship comes in before my dock rots. - Unknown
Old and young, we are all on our last cruise. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Take a cruise down to the Virgin's Island. - Archie Bunker
BANG - A four-letter Italian word for good-bye. - Archie Bunker
Imported from a little town in Italy... Fresno. - Archie Bunker
If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters
Tell the men to fire faster and not give up the ship. - Captain James Lawrence
I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship. - Louisa May Alcott
A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for. - John Shedd
If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile. - Lynda Barry
An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith
After the ship has sunk, a consultant knows how it might have been saved. - Newt Hielscher
Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V
That's how ya got your Chinatown, your Harlems, your Little Italy... all them grettos. - Archie Bunker
When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones
If the highest aim of a captain were to preserve his ship, he would keep it in port forever. - Thomas Aquinas
No one would have ever crossed the ocean if they could have gotten off the ship in the storm. - Charles F. Ketterling
The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller
Italy, and the spring and first love all together should suffice to make the gloomiest person happy. - Bertrand Russell
I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie
Mexican, Mediterranean, Italian, sushi, I love it all. Put it on a plate, and as long as I know what it is, I will eat it. - Camren Bicondova
Most people stand on the dock of life waiting for their ship to come in when deep down inside they know it has never left port. - Zig Ziglar
He who loves practice without theory is like the sailor who boards ship without a rudder and compass and never knows where he may cast. - Leonardo da Vinci
You know that ISIS wants to go in and take over the Vatican? You have heard that. You know, that's a dream of theirs, to go into Italy. - Donald Trump
Cruise Ship Section
Costa Concordia Salvage Plans
Crack In Tower Of Pisa
David’s Return To Italy
Greatest Italian Riders
Italian Border Checkpoint for Quatros
Italian Chef Memorial
Italian Electronic Humour
Italian Grandma’s Advice
Italian Fire Exit
Leaning Against The Leaning Tower
Leaning Tower Of Pisa Dog
Leaning Tower Of Pizzas
New Italian Police Car
Perfect Ad Placement
That’s No More, Eh?
Venice on a Shoestring Budget
Why Italians Don’t Like Jehovah’s Witnesses
New Procedure for Unwrinkling Your Dog
Far North Cable Guys
Saskatchewan Snow Blower
Lost House Keys
Strange Old Vehicles
Scottish Road Sign
Too Late Now
How Paper Beats Rock
Behind Curtain Number One
One More Drop