Golf Break

Beats reading

Golf lessons at home

Next best thing to cow pasture pool



Golf Bathroom Break

It’s important to remain active in retirement

QuotaBills
Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. - Paul Gallico

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

If it weren't for golf, I'd probably be a caddie today. - George Archer

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. - Bob Hope

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump

Golf is a thinking man's game. You can have all the shots in the bag, but if you don't know what to do with them, you've got troubles. - Chi Chi Rodriguez

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle


see also   Golf  Section
Aussie Golf
Golf Club Gifts
Golf Gimme
Golf Potty Putter
Golfer Who Can’t Change

 

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23-Sep-2017