Redneck Plane Repair

How Bubba the Mechanic gets cheap airfare



Cardboard placed over plane exit door

QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

You cannot fly like an eagle with the wings of a wren. - William Henry Hudson

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets. - Mel Brooks

As the velocity of air increases, its pressure decreases. - Daniel Bernoulli

If God wanted us to fly, he would have given us air tickets. - Mel Brooks

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Frederick Douglass

The sky is the limit only for those who aren't afraid to fly. - Bob Bello

The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets. - Al McGuire

The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air. - Johann C. F. von Schiller

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott

If ever a chef were to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Poland Proverb

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus. - Robin Williams

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow. - Chinese Proverb

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo. - Al Gore

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

It's OK to have butterflies in your stomach. Just get them to fly in formation. - Rob Gilbert

Now that I've found the way to fly, which direction should I go into the night? - Ally Condie

He who waits for a roast duck to fly into his mouth must wait a very, very long time. - Chinese Proverb

You can't fly with the owls by night and expect to keep up with the eagles during the day. - Unknown

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

Nothing can move a man who is paid by the hour; how sweet the flight of time seems to his calm mind. - Charles D Warner

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

I want the pilot flying me up in the air at 30,000 feet to make more than a guy working at Taco Bell. - Michael Moore

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. - Mark Russell

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

Concentrating on poses clears the mind, while focusing on the breath helps the body shift out of fight or flight mode. - Melanie Haiken

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know so it goes flying anyway. - Mary Kay Ash

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them. - Henry David Thoreau

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. - Henry David Thoreau

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson


see also   Plane  &  Redneck  Sections
African Airlines
Airbus 2006 - A Tale of Two Pilots
Air Meal
Airplane In Suds
Amish Airlines - Maiden Voyage
Flight Instructions
India Airlines Economy Flight
Invisible Air Force One
Kulula Airlines - Flying 101
Lutheran Airlines – New Service in Minnesnowta
Middle East Airlines
Punjabi Airways
Redneck Airlines

 

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20-Aug-2017