We tried so
hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I’d like better.
I’d really like for them to know about hand-me-down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meatloaf sandwiches. I really would.
I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated. I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.
And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.
It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your dog put to sleep. I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.
I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother. And it’s all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he’s scared, I hope you let him.
When you want to see a movie and your little brother wants to tag along, I hope you’ll let him.
I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.
On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don’t ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won’t be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.
If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one. I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books. When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.
I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.
May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole. I don’t care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don’t like it. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.
I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle. May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.
I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor’s window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.
These things I wish for you - tough times and hard work, disappointment and happiness. To me, it’s the only way to appreciate life. Written with a pen.
Logic is the anatomy of thought. - Albert Einstein
One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb
Where a man feels pain he lays his hand. - Dutch Proverb
Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet
Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny
Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers
Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance. - Plato
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
Through pain I've learned to comfort suffering men. - Virgil
Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale
Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans
There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea. - Walter Bagehot
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
Suicide doesn't end the pain. It just passes it on to someone else. - James Kirkup
Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke
One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love. - Sophocles
Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased - thus do we refute entropy. - Spider Robinson
Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley
My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire
Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you
known it is healed. - Lyanla Vanzant
There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
Pain is neither intolerable nor everlasting... it is in the power of the soul to maintain its own serenity. - Marcus Aurelius
Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - O.S. Marden
Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker
I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright
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