New Element in the Periodic Table

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet now available for “Woman” element



Hazardous Materials Woman Data Sheet

Element : WOMEN
Symbol : WO+
Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
1. Boils at room temperature
2. Freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.
5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES
1. Has great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
4. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

TESTS
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.
2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD
Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained
at different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact
with each other.

!! WARNING !!
PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE
FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS. BE CAUTIOUS
ABOVE PROPERTIES ARE SHOWN BY ALL THE WOMEN OF THE WORLD.



QuotaBills
Women and elephants never forget. - Dorothy Parker

Well-behaved women never make history. - Maria Shriver

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman. - Kathy Lette

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal. - Steve Rubenstein

I've been told I'm a role model to many women. - Donald Trump

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything. - Marilyn Monroe

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. - Oscar Wilde

No one but a woman in love ever sees the maximum of men's greatness. - Anais Nin

I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife. - Tony Curtis

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea. - Honore de Balzac

A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying. - Lawrence Durrell

Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

A woman will flirt with anybody in the world as long as other people are looking on. - Oscar Wilde

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

Nothing changes the gender equation more significantly than women's economic freedom. - Gloria Steinem

When once a woman has given you her heart, you can never get rid of the rest of her body. - John Vanbrugh

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied. - Oscar Wilde

Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes. - Oscar Wilde

The clothes in themselves do not make a statement. The woman makes the statement and the dress helps. - Jean Muir

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men. - Clare Boothe Luce

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene

Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it. - Barbara Ehrenreich

I was just so lucky with 'Real Women Have Curves.' At that point, I would have done an insurance commercial. I would have done anything. - America Ferrera


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17-Oct-2019