New Element in the Periodic Table

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet now available for “Woman” element



Hazardous Materials Woman Data Sheet

Element : WOMEN
Symbol : WO+
Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
1. Boils at room temperature
2. Freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.
5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES
1. Has great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
4. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

TESTS
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.
2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD
Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained
at different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact
with each other.

!! WARNING !!
PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE
FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS. BE CAUTIOUS
ABOVE PROPERTIES ARE SHOWN BY ALL THE WOMEN OF THE WORLD.



QuotaBills
Dull women have immaculate homes. - Unknown

When a woman is openly bad she is then at her best. - Latin Proverb

A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age. - Voltaire

I have a great relationship with the Mexican people. - Donald Trump

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works. - Will Rogers

Behind every successful man is a woman.
Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

That woman is liable to come at you like a Doberman's Pincher. - Archie Bunker

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - WC Fields

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

A woman will flirt with anybody in the world as long as other people are looking on. - Oscar Wilde

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you. - Groucho Marx

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age; a woman who would tell one would tell one anything. - Oscar Wilde

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. - Agatha Christie

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan


see also   Chemistry,  Engineer  &  Relationship  Sections
New Element Discovered

Additions to the Periodic Table of Elements
Administratium - Heaviest Element Discovered
Atom Trust
BaCoN T-Shirt
Daffynitions
Governmentium
Important Health Information
Periodic Table Shower
You’re CuTe

 

Wedding Dress For Sale

Items Of Value

Redneck Fence

Snake Wrap Dress

Lakescape

Hippo Racing

Hurricane Irene

Luxury Bungalows

Day At The Beach

Something Fishy

Eavestrough Cat

Bomb Squad Notice

Church Sign Messages

Aussie Car Alarm

Haircut For Staff Meetings

Benched Puppies

Redneck Spatula

If Men Did Housework

Bag Hang-Up

Tired Truck
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

15-Oct-2018