Zen For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously

Downplaying depression in a yoga relationship


1. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
2. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
3. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
4. Get a new car for your spouse. It’ll be a great trade!
5. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
6. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
7. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand...
8. OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
9. How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?
10. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
11. When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
12. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
13. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don’t have film.
14. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
15. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
16. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
17. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
18. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
19. I couldn’t repair your brake, so I made your horn louder.
20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
22. Just remember - if the world didn’t suck, we would all fall off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
24. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
25. A day without sunshine is like night.
26. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
27. Getting lost in thought may put you in unfamiliar territory.
28. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
29. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
30. You’re diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
31. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
32. Remember that half the people you know are below average.
33. Despite the high cost of living, it’s still extremely popular.
34. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
35. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
36. Drive way too fast and you don’t have to worry about cholesterol.
37. If you intend to live forever, so far, so good.
38. Borrow money only from pessimists; they don’t expect it back.
39. Support bacteria; they’re the only culture some people have.
40. If at first you don’t succeed, destroy the evidence.
41. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
42. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
43. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
44. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.
45. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
46. Success always occurs in private; failure, in full view.
47. The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.
48. The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.
49. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
50. To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
51. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
52. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard (and not enough chlorine!)
53. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
54. If you think nobody cares try missing a couple of payments.
55. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.


QuotaBills
Life. Consider the alternative. - Marshal McLuhan

Life's short. Live passionately. - Marc A. Pitman

Life is an adventure in forgiveness. - Norman Cousins

A writer's life is the ideal life. - P G Wodehouse

Books and chocolate make life bearable. - Unknown

Life is pharmaceutical from head to cuticle. - David McCord

If life gives you melons you may be dyslexic. - Unknown

Life is the art of drawing without an eraser. - John Gardner

My grandmother made dying her life's work. - Hugh Leonard

There is just one life for each of us: our own. - Euripides

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead. - Hans Christian Andersen

If I had a pause button on my life, I would use it. - Jaycee Jay Anderson at the XXI 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics

The best way to prepare for life is to begin to live. - Elbert Hubbard

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. - Truman Capote

Remember when life's path is steep to keep your mind even. - Horace

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

It has been my philosophy of life that difficulties vanish when faced boldly. - Isaac Asimov

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life. - George Burns

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funnybone. - Reba McEntire

Half of the failures in life come from pulling one’s horse when he is leaping. - Thomas Hood

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was. - Richard L. Evans

All is pattern, all life, but we can't always see the pattern when we're part of it. - Belva Plain

Be steady and well-ordered in your life so that you can be fierce and original in your work. - Gustave Flaubert

As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction. - Irish Saying

There comes a time in every life when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your heart. - Sarah Dessen

In the arena of life the honors and rewards fall to those who show their good qualities in action. - Aristotle

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it. - Cullen Hightower

Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact. - William James

The cards you hold in the game of life mean very little - it's the way you play them that counts. - Unknown

Success in life is not a matter so much of talent or opportunity but of concentration and perseverance. - C.W. Wendte

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh. - George Bernard Shaw

You can't fall if you don't climb. But there's no joy in living your whole life on the ground. - Unknown

The key to a better life isn't always a change of scenery. Sometimes it simply requires opening your eyes. - Richelle E. Goodrich

Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again. - Alex Tan

If you deliberately set out to be less than you are capable, you'll probably be unhappy for the rest of your life. - Abraham Maslow

Two important things are to have a genuine interest in people and to be kind to them. Kindness, I've discovered, is everything in life. - Isaac Bashevis Singer

The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you lived at all. - Leo Rosten


see also   Quotes  Section
3 Stages Of A Man’s Life
4 Stages Of Life
Bacon Is Life
Balanced Family Life
Better Start In Life
Extension of Life
Leading a Remote Life
Life And Beer Are Very Similar
Life Cycle of a Chicken
Life Extension
Life Sucks
Life’s Reflections
Monastery Life
My Life Goal
My Life in Segments
One Of Life’s Equations
Secret For A Long, Happy Life
Sometimes Life Just Isn’t Fair
The Wheels of Life
Throw Your Life Away
When Life Gets You Down

 

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25-Apr-2019