Fatherly Advice

Dad & Son talk... be-fore it’s too late!


A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”

He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”


QuotaBills
Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain

The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters. - George Herbert

The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. - Tim Russert

Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. - Luke 23:24

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

My father... one of the great immorals, er, immortals, of our time. - WC Fields

I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth

Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! - Lydia Child

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald R. Ford

In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown

My heart is happy, my mind is free.
I had a father who talked with me. - Hilde Bigelow

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. - Clarence B. Kelland

I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. - Mario Cuomo

My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu

My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong. - Charles Wadsworth

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. - Matthew 5:14-16

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill designed for the purpose. - Winston Churchill

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

Golf is a thinking man's game. You can have all the shots in the bag, but if you don't know what to do with them, you've got troubles. - Chi Chi Rodriguez


see also   Golf  Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages

 

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20-Jun-2018