Chewing Gum Hazard

Government Health Warning: Do Not Swallow Chewing Gum

“Hemeroid Helper” Class - Rectum? Darned near killed ’em!



Exercise class sitting on exercise balls

QuotaBills
Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit. - Phyllis Diller

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Of all the 36 alternatives, running away is best. - Chinese Proverb

I'm so unfamiliar with the gym I call it James. - Chi McBride

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. - Albert Schweitzer

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

He really is terribly heavy going. Like running up hill in roller skates. - Alan Ayckbourn

After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown

After I make a lot of money, I'll be able to afford running for office. - Christy Romano

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

I live in California, so I do stand-up paddle board, which is a killer workout. - Ashley Wagner

One cannot spend one's entire life running into bathrooms when danger calls! - Reif Larsen

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. - Unknown

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

The beauty is that people often come here for the stretch, and leave with a lot more. - Liza Ciano

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

There is no impossibility to him who stands prepared to conquer every hazard. The fearful are the failing. - Sarah J. Hale

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

I've seen so many young men over the years who think they're running at other young men. They are not. They are running at me. - Markus Zusak

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

If you put yourself in a position where you have to stretch outside your comfort zone, then you are forced to expand your consciousness. - Les Brown

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates


see also   Exercise,  Medical  &  Stress  Sections

 

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Car Moochanic

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If I Had A City

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Despicable Wood Stove

Stay Off The Grass

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27-Jul-2017