Heavy Drinking

Tips on a healthy drinker’s lifestyle



“I just read an article on the dangers of heavy drinking.
Scared the crap out of me!
So that’s it - after today, no more reading ...”


Heavy Drinking Tips


QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor


see also   Bar   Section
Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s?
Be Careful Pulling Out
Camping For Seniors
Cell Phone For Seniors
Daily Exercise for Seniors
Dreams Come True
Driving Tip For The Elderly
Fruit Salad Dinner
Justice For All
Neck Exercises to do at the Computer
New Wine For Seniors
Senile Agitation
Snowplow For Seniors
Texas Wine Glass
Texting Abbreviations for the Elderly
Winter Laundry
Working Past 65

 

Sorry Tree

Air Meal

Jet Ski Transport

Sock Anatomy

Table Head Wireless

Dates For Everyone

Different Drugs

Clear View

Dog Hates Junk E-Mail

When You Gotta Go

Grillin' Down South

Balled Up

Blind (Braille) Sudoku Puzzles

Glassman

Family Picture
Submissions by Roy TaylorFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

25-May-2017