Tearable Puns  (pdf)

Quite possibly the worst of the wurst



The worst of the wurst puns



Word play is an art form. A pun is its own reword!

QuotaBills
A pun is the lowest form of wit. - John Dennis

Coincidences are spiritual puns. - G K Chesterton

Fair speech may hide a foul heart. - JRR Tolkien

Puns are a form of humor with words. - Guillermo C. Infante

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Discretion in speech is more than eloquence. - Sir Francis Bacon

Good sayings are like pearls strung together. - Chinese Proverb

My puns are not trivial. They are quadrivial. - James Joyce

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

I respect a man who knows how to spell a word more than one way. - Mark Twain

You're not a star until they can spell your name in Karachi. - Humphrey Bogart

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. - Mark Twain

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

Of puns it has been said that they who most dislike them are least able to utter them. - Edgar Allan Poe

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in…it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

He respects Owl, because you can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right. - A. A. Milne

Charity, good behaviour, amiable speech, unselfishness - these by the chief sage have been declared the elements of popularity. - Burmese Proverb

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Lord Francis Bacon


see also   Pun-e  Section
Animal Puns
Christmas Music Composer Puns
Christmas Puns
‘First’ Class Puns
Humourous Puns
Pun-Dumb-Oh-nium
Puns Intended
Puntastic
Wurst Wi-Fi

 

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30-Apr-2017