Muslim Marriage

How to keep a Muslim husband happy


A Muslim wife complains to her husband that all the romance had gone out of their marriage.

“Remember when you used to carry me up to bed?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he replied, “but be fair, you were only nine at the time!”

Muslim Marriage at nine years old

QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

A good husband is healthy and absent. - Japanese Proverb

Love is not love without a violin playing goat. - Julia Roberts

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

A deaf husband and a blind wife make the best couple. - French Proverb

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

I don't teach my children what is Hindu and what is Muslim. - Shah Rukh Khan

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

Without doubt, Malaysia is the great economic star of the Muslim world. - Martin Jacques

Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times. - Rita Rudner

My husband and I have figured out a really good system about the housework: neither one of us does it. - Dottie Archibald

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me. - Groucho Marx

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

My husband is so useless that it's hard for me to be romantic with him. I get down on the floor and say, "If you love me, blink your eyes." - Phyllis Diller

There is no sign saying 'good Muslim' or 'bad Muslim.' How many lives will be lost or destroyed trying to determine who is good or who is bad? - Pauline Hanson

My husband went through a phase of giving me vacuum cleaners, sewing machines and Mixmasters. It's ironic. He is encouraging me to develop a hobby, I think. - Cate Blanchett

Allah's the Arabic term for God. Stand up for God, fight for God, work for God and do the right thing, and go the right way, things will end up in your corner. - Muhammad Ali

I want to be one of those old couples you see still holding hands and laughing after fifty years of marriage. That's what I want. I want to be someone's forever. - Rachel Gibson

We certainly love the Muslim people. But that is not the faith of this country. And that is not the religion that built this nation. The people of the Christian faith and the Jewish faith are the ones who built America, and it is not Islam. - Franklin Graham

The Muslim world just doesn't believe that skin color is all that important. Obama may be half-black, but he's still all-Western, according to them. It doesn't matter whether you're black, white or green - if you're not a devotee of Muhammad, you don't matter. - Ben Shapiro

My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him. - Rita Rudner

A Muslim fanatic and a Christian fanatic, a Jewish fanatic, a secular fanatic, an atheist fanatic, a communist fanatic - all of them are the same. The thinking that, 'If you don't think like me, that if you are not with me, then you are against me;' this is something to condemn. - Marjane Satrapi


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23-Jul-2019