Cataract Surgery Lawsuit

Susan Sues after an eye-opening Down Under operation



A West Australian newspaper recently reported that a woman, Mrs. Susan Maynard, has sued a Perth Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex.

A hospital spokesman replied, “Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight.”

Australian Cataract Surgery for Mrs. Maynard

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Necessity hath no law. - Oliver Cromwell

The law is silent during war. - Cicero

Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden

Make crime pay. Become a lawyer. - Will Rogers

Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Law is order, and good law is good order. - Aristotle

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

To live outside the law, you must be honest. - Bob Dylan

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger. - Martial

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke. - Robin Hall

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. - William Shakespeare

Talk is cheap until you hire a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe Defries

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

There is no grievance that is a fit object of redress by mob law. - Abraham Lincoln

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. - Ambrose Bierce

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

Lawsuit: a machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

I don't want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. - Roy M. Cohn

Law school is the opposite of sex. Even when it's good it's lousy. - Unknown

Lawyers are like beavers: They get in the middle of the stream and dam it up. - Donald Rumsfeld

I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny

A lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth. - Patrick Murray

A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

To make laws that man cannot, and will not obey, serves to bring all law into contempt. - Elizabeth C Stanton

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day

Law: an ordinance of reason for the common good, made by him who has care of the community. - Thomas Aquinas

Law enforcement cannot succeed without the sustained, and informed, interest of all citizens. - Lyndon B Johnson

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

I don't want a lawyer to tell me what I cannot do. I hire one to tell me how to do what I want to do. - J P Morgan

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

What we lawyers want to do is to substitute courts for carnage, dockets for rockets, briefs for bombs, warrants for warheads, mandates for missiles. - George Rhyne

There is only one categorical imperative: Act only according to that maxim by which you can at the same time will that it should become universal law. - Immanuel Kant


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18-Jun-2018