Fruit Salad Dinner

Inspiration for a grape dining experience


Last night I had a salad for dinner.

It was a fruit salad. It had grapes.

Lots of grapes. It was all grapes.

It was wine.



QuotaBills
Beulah, peel me a grape. - Mae West

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

German headshrinker named Sigmund Fruit - Archie Bunker

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - William Shakespeare

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Excellence in any pursuit is the late, ripe fruit of toil. - W.M.L. Jay

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. - Enrico Caruso

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

If life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it. - Unknown

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling. - Rodney Dangerfield

Self-respect is the fruit of discipline; the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. - Abraham J. Heschel

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - the Joe-kster


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19-May-2019