I worked forty-five years for someone else
So that I could retire;
I dreamed of sleeping late,
And sitting by the fire.

I dreamed of long vacations -
Enjoying stage and song;
But, let me set you straight on that concept -
It is simply wrong.

I junked my safety glasses
And the work boots that cramped my toes;
But the rest of it had a mind of its own -
And this is how it goes.

My wife had been thinking of retirement
And had plans of her own;
She had spent much time with the kids,
But now they are grown and gone.

We sold our cattle and horses
So we wouldn't have that chore.
I poured concrete over my alarm clock -
But still wake up at four.

I get my eyes checked on Monday,
Ann gets hers checked the next day;
I go for a colon check on Wednesday -
And pass my wife going the other way.

I have a dental appointment on Thursday,
Ann goes for a test on her heart;
Friday we go get prescriptions filled,
And browse a while at Walmart.

Saturdays we just stay home
And try to get the paperwork right;
We can't take any overnight trips
'Cause we can't see to drive at night.

Restroom confusion keeps us out of Church,
And we really do hate that;
There's nothing wrong with the restrooms -
We just can't remember where they're at.

We don't need to plan next week,
Just make sure that we can drive;
And not forget where the hospitals and clinics are -
We'll need them to survive.

So, don't build your castles too high, my friend,
While strolling through the clover;
This is a typical week in retirement -
And on Monday we start all over!