The Van Gogh Family Tree

After much careful research, it has been discovered that the
artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were...


His dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh
His unemployed cousin: Let Gogh
The brother who ate prunes: Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store: Stopn Gogh
The brother who bleached his clothes white: Hue Gogh
His obnoxious brother: Please Gogh
The cousin from Illinois: Chi-ca Gogh
His magician uncle: Where-diddy Gogh
His Mexican cousin: A Mee Gogh
The Mexican cousin’s American half brother: Grin Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach: Wells-far Gogh
The constipated uncle: Can’t Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt: Tang Gogh
The bird lover uncle: Fla-min Gogh
His nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
The fruit loving cousin: Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking: Way-to Gogh
The little bouncy nephew: Poe Gogh
The bouncy nephew’s brother who lives in Penticton: Ogo Poe Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia: U Gogh
A sister who loved disco: Go Gogh
A pregnant sister: Pre Gogh
The grandmother who was a 1950’s carhop @ A&W: Letsall Gogh
His Italian uncle: Day Gogh
His uncle with a corporate image: Lo Gogh
His niece who travels the country in a van: Winnie Bay Gogh
And the moroff who browses joe-ks.com: Where2 Gogh

And there ya Gogh...



QuotaBills
Friends are the family you choose. - Jennifer Aniston

People like to trace their ancestry. - Richard Dawkins

A happy family is but an earlier heaven. - Sir John Bowring

My parents put a live teddy bear in my crib. - Woody Allen

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

I think the family was from Hungaria. (talking about Noah's Ark) - Archie Bunker

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman

I come from an Irish Catholic family, and hell-raising is part of the DNA. - Brian Dennehy

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. - George Bernard Shaw

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

If you're Irish, it doesn't matter where you go - you'll find family. - Victoria Smurfit

Your family is depending on you. No better reason to bring all your game all the time. - Grant Cardone

He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller

We are, in the comics, the last frontier of good, wholesome family humor and entertainment. - Bill Keane

There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children - one is roots, and the other, wings. - Hodding S. Carter

I don't know who my grandfather was, I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be. - Abraham Lincoln

All his successors gone before him have done’t; and all his ancestors that come after him may. - William Shakespeare

I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon

When you start about family, about lineage and ancestry, you are talking about every person on earth. - Alex Haley

The first who was king was a fortunate soldier: Who serves his country well has no need of ancestors. - Voltaire

My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't of had anything to play with. - Rodney Dangerfield

All dentists talk while they work. They have inherited this from their professional ancestors, the barbers. - Mark Twain

Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

There is no king who has not had a slave among his ancestors, and no slave who has not had a king among his. - Helen Keller

My parents have been visiting me for a few days. I just dropped them off at the airport. They leave tomorrow. - Margaret Smith

The man who has nothing to boast of but his illustrious ancestry is like the potato - the best part under ground. - Thomas Overbury

The unjustifiable severity of a parent is loaded with this aggravation, that those whom he injures are always in his sight. - Joseph Addison

Children despise their parents until the age of forty, when they suddenly become just like them, thus preserving the system. - Quentin Crewe

We are all omnibuses in which our ancestors ride, and every now and then one of them sticks his head out and embarrasses us. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

Our ancestors are very good kind of folks; but they are the last people I should choose to have a visiting acquaintance with. - Richard B. Sheridan

The family should be a place where each new human being can have an early atmosphere conducive to the development of constructive creativity. - Edith Schaeffer

A man finds room in the few square inches of the face for the traits of all his ancestors; for the expression of all his history, and his wants. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our ancestors ... possessed a right, which nature has given to all men, of departing from the country in which chance, not choice has placed them. - Thomas Jefferson

If you think that nobility consists of having sixteen ancestors rather than merit, great Prince, then you may - and you may also praise or condemn me. - Franz Grillparzer


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22-Jul-2018