When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion…
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part…
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most of all…
10) Everyone PRAISES the man and THANKS him for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed “her night off.” And, upon seeing her
annoyed reaction, concludes that there’s just no pleasing some women!
A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb
God created man, but I could do better. - Erma Bombeck
The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael
Every man is the architect of his own fortune. - Sallust
A man thinks he knows, but a woman knows better. - Indian Proverb
Never contend with a man who has nothing to lose. - Baltasar Gracian
Man has no nobler function than to defend the truth. - Mahalia Jackson
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields
Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy
No man can think clearly when his fists are clinched. - G.J. Nathan
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. - Kin Hubbard
He's the Man of the Hour, at this particular moment. - Don King
It is not opposition but indifference which separates men. - Mary Parker Follett
He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces. - Mae West
It is the weak man who urges compromise - never the strong man. - Elbert Hubbard
Wise men learn by other men's mistakes, fools by their own. - H.G. Bohn
No man should leave in the universe anything of which he is afraid. - G K Chesterton
Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another. - H L Mencken
I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare
Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham
The only man who makes no mistakes is the man who never does anything. - Theodore Roosevelt
Without faith, a man can do nothing; with it, all things are possible. - William Osler
The richest man is not he who has the most, but he who needs the least. - Unknown
It is better to risk saving a guilty man than to condemn an innocent one. - Voltaire
A speculator is a man who observes the future, and acts before it occurs. - Bernard Baruch
What is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul? - Matthew 16:26
I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid. - Dorothy Parker
A psychiatrist is a man who goes to Les Folies Bergere and looks at the audience. - Mervyn Stockwood
The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. - Samuel Johnson
The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf. - Mark Twain
The greatest men have been those who have cut their way to success through difficulties. - F.W. Robertson
Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein
Being the boss anywhere is lonely. Being a female boss in a world of mostly men is especially so. - Robert Frost
Bogart could have been color blind. He got to know a man before he decided if he liked him or not. - Sammy Davis, Jr.
Inflation is as violent as a mugger, as frightening as an armed robber and as deadly as a hit man. - Ronald Reagan
I submit to you that if a man hasn't discovered something he will die for, he isn't fit to live. - Martin Luther King Jr.
The inauspiciousness of the owl is nothing but the inauspiciousness of the man who thinks that owl is inauspicious. - Mehmet Murat ildan
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato
Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain
see also Dining, Food & Marriage
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