When A Man Does The BBQ

Why men volunteer to do the barbeque


When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion…

1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

Here comes the important part…
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine…

5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.

Important again…
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine…

8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most of all…

10) Everyone PRAISES the man and THANKS him for his cooking efforts.

11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed “her night off.” And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there’s just no pleasing some women!


QuotaBills
An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

What kind of man gives cigarettes to trees? - Robin Williams

It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. - Aristotle

Most men would rather deny a hard truth than face it. - George R.R. Martin

The superior man is distressed by his want of ability. - Confucius

The strongest man in the world is he who stands alone. - Henrik Ibsen

Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of our science. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men often applaud an imitation, and hiss the real thing. - Aesop

Men do less than they ought, unless they do all they can. - Thomas Carlyle

You can tell the greatness of a man by what makes him angry. - Abraham Lincoln

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. - Arnold Haultain

A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears. - Woodrow Wyatt

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think. - Milton Berle

A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact. - Bertrand Russell

The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool. - William Shakespeare

The apprenticeship of difficulty is one which the greatest of men have had to serve. - Samuel Smiles

An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field. - Niels Bohr

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. - Plato

You must be a man of integrity. Never break your word. Don't have two sets of standards. - Red Auerbach

Most people can bear adversity. But if you wish to know what a man really is, give him power. - Robert G. Ingersoll

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I've never killed a man, but I've read many an obituary with a great deal of satisfaction. - Mark Twain

What a chimera then is man. What a novelty! What a monster... what a contradiction, what a prodigy. - Blaise Pascal

The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little. - Mark Twain

Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde

The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers. - Sydney Harris

Our duty, as men and women, is to proceed as if limits to our ability did not exist. We are collaborators in creation. - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Whenever a man's friends begin to compliment him about looking young, he may be sure they think he is getting old. - Washington Irving

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

Therefore if a man look sharply and attentively, he shall see Fortune; for though she be blind, yet she is not invisible. - Francis Bacon

Men have trouble dealing with a woman in a position of authority. I've never had trouble with a woman in any position. - Sam Malone

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato

The secret of many a man's success in the world resides in his insight into the moods of men and his tact in dealing with them. - J.G. Holland

A wise man is cured of ambition by ambition itself; his aim is so exalted that riches, office, fortune and favour cannot satisfy him. - Samuel Johnson

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

Almost every man wastes part of his life in attempts to display qualities which he does not possess, and to gain applause which he cannot keep. - Samuel Johnson

Every man, as to character, is the creature of the age in which he lives. Very few are able to raise themselves above the ideas of their times. - Voltaire


see also  Dining, Food  &  Marriage   Sections
A Man’s BBQ
A Man’s Grill
Aussie Barbie
Barbecue Pickup
BBQ Invitation
BBQ Wagon
Campfire Genius
Chinese BBQ
Computer Barbecue
Country Cookin’
Friendly BBQ Reminder
Great American Weenie Roast - Pitchfork Special
Grillbillies
Hot Chicks
Jet-Powered Barbecue
Louisiana Turtle Dogs
Perfect Grill
Real Man’s Barbecue
Redneck Barbecue
Redneck Box Barbeque
Redneck Campfire
Redneck Fire Alarm
Redneck Grills
Redneck Stove Burner
Romanian Barbeque
Shopping Cart Hotplate

 

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15-Oct-2018