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Celebrate Womanhood!
Does your pantyhose light up when jogging?

A friend of mine confused her valium with her birth control pills. She had 14 kids, but she doesn’t really care.

Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes!

I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.

I know what Victoria’s Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.

I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are: eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day.

Now I’ve forgotten my address, my mother’s maiden name, and my keys. But I’ve never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like, “You know, sometimes I just forget to eat.”

Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him!


see also   Aging  Section

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25-May-2013

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