A little dirt never hurt anyone, just wipe it off.
Act your age.
Always say please and thank you - that way, you get more.
Am I talking to a brick wall?
As long as you live under my roof, you’ll live by my rules.
Big boys don’t cry.
C’mon, you throw like a girl.
Coffee will stunt your growth.
Could those sleeves be any longer?
Didn’t your teacher learn you anything?
Do what I say, not what I do.
Do you think I’m made of money?
Don’t ask me, ask your mother.
Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see.
Don’t give me any of your lip, young lady.
Don’t make me stop the car!
Don’t tell on anybody unless you tell on yourself first.
Don’t use that tone with me!
Don’t worry. It’s only blood.
Don’t you know any normal boys?
Enough is enough!
Get your elbows off the table.
Hey, did you hear me talking to you?
“Hey” is for horses.
I didn’t feel a thing.
I don’t care what other people are doing - I’m not everybody else’s father!
I feel for you, but I can’t reach you from here.
I got my tongue wrapped around my eye-tooth and couldn’t see what I was saying.
I told you, keep your eye on the ball.
If I catch you doing that one more time, I’ll...
If I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you.
If you’re gonna be dumb, you’ve gotta be tough.
If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times.
If you forget, you’ll be grounded till the end of the world.
I’ll play catch after I read the paper.
I’ll tell you why. Because I said so. That’s why.
I’m not just talking to hear my own voice!
I’m not sleeping, I was watching that channel.
I’m not watching television. I’m resting my eyes.
It’s hard to be good, and easy to be bad.
Just wait on the corner and another one will come along.
Men are like buses.
No, we’re not there yet.
Now you listen to ME, Buster!
Shake it off. It’s only pain.
Sit up straight!
So you think you’re smart, do you?
This is your last warning.
This will hurt me a lot more than it hurts you.
Turn off those lights.
Two wrongs do not make a right.
We’re not lost. I’m just not sure where we are.
Were you raised in a barn? Close the door.
What did I just get finished telling you?
What do you think I am, a bank?
What keeps those jeans of yours from falling off?
What part of NO don’t you understand?
What will other parents think?
What’s so funny?
When I was your age , I treated MY father with respect.
Who said life was supposed to be fair?
Wipe that smile off your face.
Wipe your feet!
Worrying about things you can’t change is like a rocking chair - it gives you
something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.
You call that a haircut?
You call that noise “music”?
You can marry a rich guy just as easily as you can a poor guy.
You didn’t beat me. I let you win.
You know you’re always gonna be Daddy’s little girl.
You look like a bag lady!
You should visit more often.
You want something to do? I’ll give you something to do.
Young ladies perspire, they do not sweat.
You’re not leaving my house dressed like that!
Your mother worries too much.
Good sayings are like pearls strung together. - Chinese Proverb
Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown
Love is the silent saying and saying of a single name. - Mignon McLaughlin
A proverb is a wise saying, old yet radiant with novelty. - Erasmus
I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman
Spring is nature's way of saying, "Let's party!" - Robin Williams
Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader. - Jackson Radcliffe
The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman
My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins
Saying no to something is actually much more powerful than saying yes. - Tom Hanks
The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden
Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech
I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. - Mario Cuomo
My father used to say, "If you want to be different, do something different." - Wynton Marsalis
I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke
One of the most important things a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Ray Chenoweth
I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain
That's what Abel was saying when he got it in the back from his own brother with a cane. - Archie Bunker
You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost
You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you. - Groucho Marx
There's an old saying in Hollywood: It's not the length of your film, it's how you use it. - Ben Stiller
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields
He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker
I want to die like my father; peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers. - Bob Monkhouse
The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell
One-half the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough. - Josh Billings
We dream to give ourselves hope. To stop dreaming - well, that's like saying you can never change your fate. - Amy Tan
If you find yourself saying, "But I can't speak English...", try adding the word "... yet". - Jane Revell
I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor
My Dad once said, "you wouldn't worry so much about what people thought of you if you knew how seldom they did." - Dr. Phil McGraw
To be a successful father... there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years. - Ernest Hemingway
I was Ashallayn’darkmyr Tallyn, son of Mab, former prince of the Unseelie Court, and I was not afraid of a witch on a broom. - Julie Kagawa
Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown
My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter
When I was nine, my father said 'You can take piano lessons or do karate' - I had a black belt and was competing before I was 19. - Elodie Yung
If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain
Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Lord Francis Bacon
Style is that which indicates how the writer takes himself and what he is saying. It is the mind skating circles around itself as it moves forward. - Robert Frost
Father’s Day Selfie
I Love Dad
“Must Have” Power Drill
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages
When You Gotta Go
Aussie Shopping Cart
Classic Ballet Ad
Tea Party Weapon