Da Vinci Code Revealed

Religious Conspiracy? Finally, the truth about the Da Vinci Code!


A team of archaeologists were excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:


It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least three thousand years old!


The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. After months of conferences, they held a huge meeting to discuss the meaning of the markings.



The President of the society pointed to the first drawing and said, This is a woman. We can judge that their culture was family oriented and held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a donkey - so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil. The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them.


Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine had hit the earth and food didn't grow, they would seek food from the sea. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.


The audience applauded enthusiastically, but a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said, Idiots - Hebrew is read from right to left... It says, 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Chick.'


QuotaBills
The secret of life is in art. - Oscar Wilde

Give me a museum and I'll fill it. - Pablo Picasso

Karma yoga is a supreme secret indeed. - Bhagavad Gita

The current tax code is a daily mugging. - Ronald Reagan

Self-trust is the first secret of success. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

The secret of getting things done is to act! - Dante Alighieri

The secret of being boring is to say everything. - Voltaire

The secret of being a bore is to tell everything. - Voltaire

The town where I grew up has a zip code of E-I-E-I-O. - Martin Mull

No one gossips about other people's secret virtues. - Bertrand Russell

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

The secret of my success is a two-word answer: Know people. - Harvey S Firestone

The secret of success is to do common things uncommonly well. - John D. Rockefeller

The secret of success is to make your vocation your vacation. - Mark Twain

A neurosis is a secret you don't know you're keeping. - Kenneth Tynan

The secret of my success was clean living and a fast outfield. - Lefty Gomez

Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni

The secret of your success is determined by your daily agenda. - John C Maxwell

In everything the ends well defined are the secret of durable success. - Victor Cousins

The secret to happiness is to face the fact that the world is horrible. - Bertrand Russell

To tend, unfailingly, unflinchingly, towards a goal, is the secret of success. - Anna Pavlova

When I look at my life and its secret colours, I feel like bursting into tears. - Albert Camus

We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows. - Robert Frost

The secret of achievement is to hold a picture of a successful outcome in the mind. - Thoreau

The secret of a happy life is to know when to stop and then go that little bit further. - Unknown

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. - Swami Sivananda

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Our pleasures are not material pleasures, but symbols of pleasure - attractively packaged but inferior in content. - Alan Watts

There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan

Anyone who practices can obtain success in yoga but not one who is lazy. Constant practice alone is the secret of success. - Svatmarama

I think Mick Jagger would be astounded and amazed if he realized that to many people he is not a sex symbol, but a mother image. - David Bowie

The secret of many a man's success in the world resides in his insight into the moods of men and his tact in dealing with them. - J.G. Holland

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C Maxwell

I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it. But you have to be efficient if you’re going to be lazy. - Shirley Conran

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


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25-Mar-2019