Da Vinci Code Revealed

Religious Conspiracy? Finally, the truth about the Da Vinci Code!


A team of archaeologists were excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:


It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least three thousand years old!


The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. After months of conferences, they held a huge meeting to discuss the meaning of the markings.



The President of the society pointed to the first drawing and said, This is a woman. We can judge that their culture was family oriented and held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a donkey - so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil. The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them.


Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine had hit the earth and food didn't grow, they would seek food from the sea. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.


The audience applauded enthusiastically, but a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said, Idiots - Hebrew is read from right to left... It says, 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Chick.'


QuotaBills
The secret to humor is surprise. - Aristotle

Karma yoga is a supreme secret indeed. - Bhagavad Gita

Self-trust is the first secret of success. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

The secret of success is consistency of purpose. - Benjamin Disraeli

The secret of being boring is to say everything. - Voltaire

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead. - Ben Franklin

The secret of being tiresome is to tell everything. - Voltaire

A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age. - Voltaire

The secret to having it all is knowing you already do. - Unknown

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

The secret of success is to make your vocation your vacation. - Mark Twain

A neurosis is a secret you don't know you're keeping. - Kenneth Tynan

The secret of my success was clean living and a fast outfield. - Lefty Gomez

Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni

The secret of your success is determined by your daily agenda. - John C Maxwell

Prose is a museum, where all the old weapons of poetry are kept. - T.E. Hulme

It is a symbol of Irish art. The cracked looking-glass of a servant. - James Joyce

To follow, without halt, one aim: There's the secret of success. - Anna Pavlova

When I look at my life and its secret colours, I feel like bursting into tears. - Albert Camus

We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows. - Robert Frost

The secret of achievement is to hold a picture of a successful outcome in the mind. - Thoreau

Zest is the secret of all beauty. There is no beauty that is attractive without zest. - Christian Dior

Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered I was not God. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. - Swami Sivananda

The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided. - Casey Stengel

The true secret of happiness lies in taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life. - William Morris

The secret of managing is to keep the 5 guys who hate you away from the 5 guys who are undecided. - Casey Stengel

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what it is one's destiny to do, and then do it. - Henry Ford

I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums. - Steven Wright

Anyone who practices can obtain success in yoga but not one who is lazy. Constant practice alone is the secret of success. - Svatmarama

The secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have, and to be able to lose all desire for things beyond your reach. - Lin Yutang

I think Mick Jagger would be astounded and amazed if he realized that to many people he is not a sex symbol, but a mother image. - David Bowie

The secret of many a man's success in the world resides in his insight into the moods of men and his tact in dealing with them. - J.G. Holland

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C Maxwell

The greatest sweetener of human life is Friendship. To raise this to the highest pitch of enjoyment, is a secret which but few discover. - Joseph Addison

I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it. But you have to be efficient if you’re going to be lazy. - Shirley Conran

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


see also   History  &  Religious  Sections
Hebrew Cave Symbols (original version)

Arch Support
Chanukah Special
CNN Breaking News
Jewish Assembly
Jerushalom
Jewrusalem
No Shorts
Olive Weather Forecast
Starbucks Bethlehem
Swimming in the Dead Sea
Tel Aviv Luxury Penthouse
The Eye Of A Needle
Tombs Of The Prophets
Yiddish 101
You Got Kicked Out Of The Restaurant


 

Fairy Soap

Throwaway Sport Paper

Young At Heart

Like No Udder

Love Thy Neighbour

Good To The Last Drop

Gated Community

Squat Statue

Pothole Garden

Flood Games

Cadillac Clearance

Wheelbarrow Parking

Hebrew Sudoku Puzzles A

Bringing It Home

Why Bearded Men Never Shave
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

24-Jun-2017