Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
A quiet fool is half a sage. - Yiddish Proverb

Justice delayed is justice denied. - William Gladstone

I don't want tea, I want justice! - Ally Carter

A fool and his money are soon elected. - Will Rogers

A bad compromise beats a good lawsuit. - Saying

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb

Justice is incidental to law and order. - J Edgar Hoover

Fools look to tomorrow; wise men use tonight. - Scottish Proverb

If you want peace, you must work for justice. - Pope Paul VI

Judge, could I, waddya call, encroach the bench? - Archie Bunker

Stop soft soapin' and trying to deterge the judge! - Archie Bunker

A fox should not be on the jury at a goose's trial. - Thomas Fuller

Wise men profit more from fools than fools from wise men. - Cato

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

I would uphold the law if for no other reason but to protect myself. - Thomas More

Nature never makes any blunders. When she makes a fool she means it. - Archibald Alexander

He who breaks a resolution is a weakling. He who makes one is a fool. - F.M. Knowles

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot

I don't want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. - Roy M. Cohn

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool. - William Shakespeare

The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool. - William Shakespeare

I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. - Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool. - George Santayana

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet. - Mark Twain

What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary? - Marion Barry

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

Great men undertake great things because they are great; fools, because they think them easy. - Vauvenargues

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. - Herbert Spencer

My imagination makes me human and makes me a fool; it gives me all the world and exiles me from it. - Ursula K. Le Guin

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

Whatever their other contributions to our society, lawyers could be an important source of protein. - Guindon

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right. - Mark Twain

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws. - Plato

Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes. - Robert Kennedy

Always remember money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense. - Earl Wilson

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

Man's capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but man's inclination to injustice makes democracy necessary. - Reinhold Niebuhr

New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time. - James Agate

One does not, by knowing all the physical laws as we know them today, immediately obtain an understanding of anything much. - Richard Feynman

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

We discern across the centuries a commanding and versatile intelligence, wielding with equal force the sword of war and of justice. - Winston Churchill

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. - Bertrand Russell

Justice, sir, is the great interest of man on earth. It is the ligament which holds civilized beings and civilized nations together. - Daniel Webster

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

Men may change their climate, but they cannot change their nature. A man that goes out a fool cannot ride or sail himself into common sense. - Joseph Addison

While there is a lower class, I am in it; while there is a criminal element, I am of it; and while there is a soul in prison, I am not free. - Eugene V Debs


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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25-Sep-2018