Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
Generosity is the flower of justice. - Nathaniel Hawthorne

The fool wonders, the wise man asks. - Benjamin Disraeli

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb

Justice is incidental to law and order. - J Edgar Hoover

A flagrant violation of international law. - Unknown

Showing off is the fool's idea of glory. - Bruce Lee

Fools look to tomorrow; wise men use tonight. - Scottish Proverb

Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

Judge, could I, waddya call, encroach the bench? - Archie Bunker

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

Last words are for fools who haven't said enough. - Karl Marx

I have always fought for concrete facts, for justice. - Fidel Castro

To the wise, life is a problem; to the fool, a solution. - Marcus Aurelius

That's the spirit - one part brave, three parts fool. - Christopher Paolini

When a fool has made up his mind, the market has gone by. - Spanish Proverb

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

Don't judge me by my past. I don't live there anymore. - Unknown

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

My photographs don't do me justice – they just look like me. - Phyllis Diller

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. - Ambrose Bierce

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made. - Otto von Bismarck

Impossible is a word to be found only in the dictionary of fools. - Napoleon Bonaparte

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

True friends don't judge each other, they judge other people together. - Unknown

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. - Bertrand Russell

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions. - Wilson Mizner

True peace is not merely the absence of tension; it is the presence of justice. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. - Ernest Hemingway

A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. - Herbert Spencer

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. - Groucho Marx

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. - Groucho Marx

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it. - WC Fields

There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers

Always remember money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense. - Earl Wilson

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted? - George Carlin

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. - Norm Crosby

As a rule man is a fool,
When it's hot he wants it cool,
When it's cool he wants it hot,
Always wanting what is not. - Unknown

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread. - Anatole France


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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21-Jan-2019