Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
I don't want tea, I want justice! - Ally Carter

All children are essentially criminal. - Denis Diderot

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

The good of the people is the chief law. - Cicero

We judge of man's wisdom by his hope. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is better to be a fool than to be dead. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Fools look to tomorrow; wise men use tonight. - Scottish Proverb

Gravity isn't easy, but it's the law. - Unknown

Swift justice demands more than just swiftness. - Potter Stewart

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Laws do not persuade just because they threaten. - Seneca

Let justice be done though the heavens should fall. - John Adams

The law must be stable, but it must not stand still. - Roscoe Pound

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

Last words are for fools who haven't said enough. - Karl Marx

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx

The power of the lawyer is in the uncertainty of the law. - Jeremy Bentham

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. - Latin Proverb

There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress. - Mark Twain

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

Do not judge a man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins. - Native American Proverb

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one. - Mark Twain

Law school is the opposite of sex. Even when it's good it's lousy. - Unknown

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions. - Wilson Mizner

Lawyers are like beavers: They get in the middle of the stream and dam it up. - Donald Rumsfeld

It's every lawyer's dream to help shape the law, not just react to it. - Alan Dershowitz

Only priests and fools are fearless and I've never been on the best of terms with God. - Patrick Rothfuss

If a man dies and leaves his estate in an uncertain condition, the lawyers become his heirs. - Edgar Watson Howe

Once in a lifetime the longed-for tidal wave of justice can rise up, and hope and history rhyme. - Seamus Heaney

The law was made for one thing alone - for the exploitation of those who don't understand it. - Bertoit Brecht

Whatever their other contributions to our society, lawyers could be an important source of protein. - Guindon

The trouble with our laws these days is that the criminals know their rights better than their wrongs. - Unknown

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right. - Mark Twain

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot, but don't let that fool you, he really is an idiot. - Groucho Marx

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it. - WC Fields

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters. - Frank Lloyd Wright

People judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so has a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown

No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison

When you say justice, it doesn't have to be war. Justice could just be clearing a path for people to dream properly. - Kanye West

One does not, by knowing all the physical laws as we know them today, immediately obtain an understanding of anything much. - Richard Feynman

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. - Bertrand Russell

Laws are like spiders' webs which, if anything small falls into them they ensnare it, but large things break through and escape. - Solon

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

Men may change their climate, but they cannot change their nature. A man that goes out a fool cannot ride or sail himself into common sense. - Joseph Addison

While there is a lower class, I am in it; while there is a criminal element, I am of it; and while there is a soul in prison, I am not free. - Eugene V Debs


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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24-Jun-2019