Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
Only a fool knows everything. - Maasai Proverb

Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden

The trouble with law is lawyers. - Clarence Darrow

Whenever law ends, tyranny begins. - John Locke

I don't want tea, I want justice! - Ally Carter

It takes two fools to have an argument. - Unknown

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

Last words are for fools who haven't said enough. - Karl Marx

I have always fought for concrete facts, for justice. - Fidel Castro

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx

Stop soft soapin' and trying to deterge the judge! - Archie Bunker

Talk is cheap until you hire a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe Defries

The power of the lawyer is in the uncertainty of the law. - Jeremy Bentham

That's the spirit - one part brave, three parts fool. - Christopher Paolini

People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves. - Albert Camus

A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless it is paid for. - Unknown

A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. - Latin Proverb

Wise men learn by other men's mistakes, fools by their own. - H.G. Bohn

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

Fools take to themselves the respect that is given to their office. - Aesop

A society that has more justice is a society that needs less charity. - Ralph Nader

Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one. - Mark Twain

We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo

I don't want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. - Roy M. Cohn

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant. - Robert Louis Stevenson

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. - Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Do not correct a fool or he will hate you. Correct a wise man and he will appreciate you. - Unknown

Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day

In Islam, the legislative power and competence to establish laws belong exclusively to God. - Ayatollah Khomeini

If a man dies and leaves his estate in an uncertain condition, the lawyers become his heirs. - Edgar Watson Howe

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races. - Homer Simpson

You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him. - Malcolm S Forbes

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

Even a wise man knows doubt from time to time, it is the fool who allows it to rule his judgement. - Jennifer Hudock

It never hurts a fool to appear before an audience, for his capacity is not a capacity for feeling. - Dale Breckenridge Carnegie

The trouble with our laws these days is that the criminals know their rights better than their wrongs. - Unknown

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. - Groucho Marx

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller

Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes. - Robert Kennedy

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers

Always remember money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense. - Earl Wilson

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

The greatest advantage I know of being thought a wit by the world is that it gives one the greater freedom of playing the fool. - Jonathan Swift


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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24-Sep-2017