Sorry About The Mess

“Housekeeper of the Year” award goes to...


This is a Houston apartment, found during a recent hurricane evacuation
inspection. By the looks of the stained couch cushions, she didn’t move
very far from here. This is NOT hurricane damage -
the apartment was found this way prior to the hurricane.
House hoarders - saving room for cigarette butts

Hard to believe there wasn’t a fire with all the cigarettes.
Did this woman ever hear of an ashtray? Nope - empty soda cups will do...
House hoarders - room full of garbage



All the Febreze, Clorox and bleach in the world isn’t going to help this mess!
House hoarders - kitchen leftovers

NOOOOOOOOO - not the computer!!!
House hoarders - computer cigarette butts

Notice the small “butt free” area around the bottom of the mouse where her
hand rubbed the mouse pad, and what keys on the keyboard that were used...
House hoarders - computer keyboard butts

Here come the gross parts...
House hoarders - bathroom butts

I’m sure she had intentions of cleaning, but probably put it off till tomorrow...
House hoarders - more bathroom butts

I don’t want to even think what that pile on the sink is...
House hoarders - and more bathroom butts and garbage

Always room for more pizza and do-nuts!
House hoarders - leftover food bonanza

House hoarders - mountain of garbage

Remember when you last said to a visitor,
“Sorry about the mess, I haven’t done my cleaning yet today!”
After looking at this, it’s safe to say that your house is not so bad after all...

QuotaBills
What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman

Art is a house that tries to be haunted. - Emily Dickinson

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

Every strike brings me closer to the next home run. - Babe Ruth

Art is the only way to run away without leaving home. - Twyla Tharp

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Without love, the rich and poor live in the same house. - Unknown

He's got that big house to maintain in San Clemency. - Archie Bunker

We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home. - Edward R. Murrow

I just heard from Bill Bailey. He's not coming home. - Henny Youngman

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. - George Carlin

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out? - Will Rogers

Don't ya know it's bad luck to keep icrons in a Christian home? - Archie Bunker

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

I have only one superstition. I make sure I touch all bases when I hit a home run. - Babe Ruth

A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it. - George Moore

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

If you want to know who is going to change this country, go home and look in the mirror. - Maude Barlow

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw with it now. - Bob Newhart

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby

If you want to see me, come over anytime. If you want to see my house, make an appointment. - Unknown

Maybe more youngsters would stay home at nights if they were not afraid to stay alone at nights. - Herbert Prochnow

Gonna be incrimated... they're gonna keep the ashes around the house in one of them silver urinals. - Archie Bunker

How do we persevere when we're adrift at sea, severed from wherever or whomever is our 'home'? - Lois Anderson

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

A happy home is one in which each spouse grants the possibility that the other may be right, though neither believes it. - Don Fraser

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. - Steven Wright


see also  Stress  Section
Hoarder Car
It’s All Mine
Light Beer House
Where’s The Remote?

 

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30-Mar-2017