Birth Control At Its Finest

Abstinence: just say no

Taking the back seat back

Preventing back seat accidents



Back Seat Birth Control

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No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. - Richard Lewis

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

At the base and birth of every successful venture you will find an enthusiast. - Winston Churchill

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

The latest thing in psychiatry is group therapy. Instead of couches, they use bunk beds. - Henny Youngman

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Without this playing with fantasy no creative work has ever yet come to birth. The debt we owe to the play of the imagination is incalculable. - Carl Jung

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller


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One

Outback Waterhole

Rethink Your Drink

Motorcycle Rain Gear

Bike Race Selfie

Instant Beer Refill

Dementia Purse

NASCAR Wheelchair

Owl Craft

Quad (Hyper) Sudoku G

Point Of View

Free Puzzle

Statue Tug Of War

Tight Fit

Braille in the Park

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Legal Exhibit

Flatulent Cow

Redneck Palm Tree

Vinyl Siding
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20-Nov-2017