Redneck Calf Feeder

Texas Titty Bar

Finding an alternative for Mom on the farm

Redneck Calf Feeder

Farmers are the salt of the earth. - Unknown

Let's make hay while it lasts. - James Lovelock

A new-born calf fears not the tiger. - Unknown

Cursing the weather is never good farming. - English Proverb

The thicker the hay, the easier it is mowed. - Alaric the Goth

I take my vacation on the combine and tractor. - Jon Tester

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. - Unknown

Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley

Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx

Appropriate rules cultivate a disciplined character. - Bill Welker

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? - George Carlin

No farmer ever plowed a field by turning it over in his mind. - George E. Woodbury

I drove a tractor almost as soon as I could reach the pedals. - Sheri L. Dew

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. - Unknown

Writing is conscience, scruple, and the farming of our ancestors. - Edward Dahlberg

Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not. - Thomas Jefferson

Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill

We seem to want one vehicle to carry people and soccer balls and hay bales. - Franz von Holzhausen

A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White

I used to practice my speeches on my tractor while I plowed my daddy's field. - Jim Hunt

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

Observe good faith and justice toward all nations. Cultivate peace and harmony with all. - George Washington

Let us never forget that the cultivation of the earth is the most important labor of man. - Daniel Webster

Genetic Engineering: A recent attempt to formalize what farmers have been doing all along. - Unknown

If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice; if he leaves it empty, he gets actors. - Bill Vaughan

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

The first farmer was the first man, and all historic nobility rests on possession and use of land. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If the rain spoils our picnic, but saves a farmer's crop, who are we to say it shouldn't rain? - Tom Barrett

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

I spend hours mowing the lawn in absolutely straight lines on my tractor. If it's not right, I do it again. - Britt Ekland

Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa

The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere. - Jim Hightower

I dream of the realization of the unity of Africa, whereby its leaders combine in their efforts to solve the problems of this continent. - Nelson Mandela

It's life, isn't it? You plow ahead and make a hit. And you plow on and someone passes you. Then someone passes them. Time levels. - Katharine Hepburn

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin

see also   Farm  &  Redneck  Sections


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