Neighborhood Watch

Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Even snakes are afraid of snakes. - Steven Wright

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. - Unknown

Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash