Trampolining Competition

How British pubs attract elderly patrons



British Trampoline Competition

Judges needed for the women’s trampolining competition

QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

OK, if you can get an indepartial judge. - Archie Bunker

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Judge, could I, waddya call, encroach the bench? - Archie Bunker

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart

There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

You can't compete with a six foot five man in a wig. - Shemar Moore

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. - Bertrand Russell

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition. - Phyllis Diller

As skateboarding evolved, it evolved away from competition. Having a best-trick contest doesn't work. - Rob Dyrdek

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. - Brendan Behan

There's a lot of fake people in the world, but before you judge them, make sure you're not one of them. - Unknown

Competition can damage self-esteem, create anxiety, and lead to cheating and hurt feelings. But so can romantic love. - Mariah Burton Nelson

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - the Joe-kster


see also   Bartender  &  Sign  Sections
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25-Feb-2018