Understanding Women

Genie in a bottle - one wish 4U...


A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord grant me one wish.” Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want.”

The Lord said, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me.”

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say “nothing”, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?”


QuotaBills
Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Genie  &  Relationship  Sections
Understanding Women - Pocket Edition

A Mother’s Love
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before Online Dating
Everything Men Know About Women
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
When Men Shop For Groceries
Will To Live
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

2fer Sudoku Puzzles E

Straightjacket Fashion

Why Stand In Line?

Shelf Ready Sleeper

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Deadneck Repairs

Starbucks Bethlehem

Bouncing Checks

Abbreviated Beetle

Nose Ring

Look At It This Way

Holy Bagel

The Ig Nobel Awards

Dead Hand

Redneck Hayride
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21-Jan-2018