Redneck Marriage

“I object, your honour!”

When wedding vows get in the way of the ceremony





QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

In married life three is company and two is none. - Oscar Wilde

If you make yourselves sheep, the wolves will eat you. - Benjamin Franklin

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Don't marry a tennis player - love means nothing to them. - Joan Rivers

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married. - Queen Elizabeth I

In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom. - Groucho Marx

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

Sir, it is your duty to get married. You can't be always living for pleasure. - Oscar Wilde

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns

Rituals are important. Nowadays it's hip not to be married. I'm not interested in being hip. - John Lennon

I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Redneck  &  Wedding  Sections

 

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17-Nov-2017