The Perfect Dress

Best way to rehearse for a dress run


Julia’s wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement. Her mother, who had recently gone through a nasty divorce, had just found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Julia was horrified to learn that her father’s new young wife had bought the exact same dress! Julia asked her step-mother to exchange it, but she refused.

“Absolutely not. I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I’m wearing it,” she replied peevishly.

Julia told her mother, who graciously said, “Never mind sweetheart. I’ll get another dress. After all, it’s your special day.”

That weekend, Julia and her Mom went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, Julia asked her mother, “Aren’t you going to return the other dress? You really don’t have another occasion where you could wear it.”

Her mother just smiled and replied, “Of course I do, dear. I’m wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding!”


QuotaBills
The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

You rarely meet a wino with perfect pitch. - George Carlin

Every good and perfect gift comes from above. - Bible

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

Perfect love means to love the one through whom one became unhappy. - Soren Kierkegaard

A diamond with a flaw is better than a common stone that is perfect. - Chinese Proverb

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

Calamity is the perfect glass wherein we truly see and know ourselves. - William D'Avenant

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

Good humor is one of the best articles of dress one can wear in society. - William Thackeray

Perhaps it is our imperfections that make us so perfect for one another. - Douglas McGrath

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Cinderella never asked for a prince. She asked for a night off and a dress. - Kiera Cass

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

He that will have a perfect brother must resign himself to remaining brotherless. - Italian proverb

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor

The wisdom of man never yet contrived a system of taxation that would operate with perfect equality. - Andrew Jackson

If you would perfect your body, guard your mind.
If you would renew your body, beautify your mind. - James Allen

You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. - Sam Keen

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Imagine if you succeeded in making the world perfect for your children what a shock the rest of life would be for them. - Joyce Maynard

We've never been cool, we're hot. Irish people are Italians who can't dress, Jamaicans who can't dance. - Bono

Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. it means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections. - Unknown

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

There is no perfect solution to depression, nor should there be. And odd as this may sound, we should be glad of that. It keeps us human. - Lesley Hazelton

Q: When is the perfect time?
A: Who can say, but probably somewhere between haste and delay - and it's usually most wise to start today. - Rasheed Ogunlaru


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22-Aug-2019