The Perfect Dress

Best way to rehearse for a dress run


Julia’s wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement. Her mother, who had recently gone through a nasty divorce, had just found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Julia was horrified to learn that her father’s new young wife had bought the exact same dress! Julia asked her step-mother to exchange it, but she refused.

“Absolutely not. I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I’m wearing it,” she replied peevishly.

Julia told her mother, who graciously said, “Never mind sweetheart. I’ll get another dress. After all, it’s your special day.”

That weekend, Julia and her Mom went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, Julia asked her mother, “Aren’t you going to return the other dress? You really don’t have another occasion where you could wear it.”

Her mother just smiled and replied, “Of course I do, dear. I’m wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding!”


QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

No, it's all in perfect working order. - Spike Milligan

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Perfect numbers, like perfect men, are very rare. - Rene Descartes

Every love's the love before in a duller dress. - Dorothy Parker

An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Perfect love sometimes does not come until the first grandchild. - Welsh Proverb

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

A diamond with a flaw is better than a common stone that is perfect. - Chinese Proverb

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right. - Frederick the Great

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

A good solution applied with vigor now is better than a perfect solution applied ten minutes later. - George S Patton

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

If your cousin Maude says one wrong word to me, we're gonna be leaving before the bride takes the shower. - Archie Bunker

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

I don't really drink sodas, but when I have popcorn or pizza I need a little. It's the perfect combination. - Alessandra Ambrosio

Anyone can get dressed up and glamorous, but it is how people dress in their days off that are the most intriguing. - Alexander Wang

Imagine if you succeeded in making the world perfect for your children what a shock the rest of life would be for them. - Joyce Maynard

We've never been cool, we're hot. Irish people are Italians who can't dress, Jamaicans who can't dance. - Bono

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

The birch-bark canoe of the savage seems to me one of the most beautiful and perfect things of the kind constructed by human art. - William C. Bryant

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

There is no perfect solution to depression, nor should there be. And odd as this may sound, we should be glad of that. It keeps us human. - Lesley Hazelton


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15-Oct-2018