Q: What is out on the lawn all summer and is Irish?
A: Paddy ’O’Furniture.
Q: What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A: A sham rock.
Q: Why do frogs like St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Because they wear green.
Q: When is an Irish Potato not an Irish Potato?
A: When it’s a French fry.
Q: What does it mean when you find a lucky horseshoe?
A: Some unlucky horse is going barefoot.
Q: Why did the elephant wear green sneakers instead of red ones?
A: The red ones were in the wash.
Q: Why is an Irish river rich?
A: Because it has two banks.
Q: What does a leprechaun call a happy man wearing green?
A: A Jolly Green Giant.
No man is an Ireland. - Richard Daley
My soul is still Irish. - Ciaran Hinds
I'm Irish. We think sideways. - Spike Milligan
Everyone is wise until he speaks. - Irish Drinking Toast
To marry the Irish is to look for poverty. - J.P. Donleavy
Yes, I am an Irish lass through and through. - Erin Andrews
When Irish eyes are smiling, watch your step. - Gerald Kersh
You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb
An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy
I'm Irish and Cherokee Indian. I can't faint. - Lynn Collins
Yelling Irish, you can sound like an angry Leprechaun. - Norman Reedus
An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw
Where would the Irish be without someone to be Irish at? - Elizabeth Bowen
If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. - Brendan Behan
The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery
Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown
You think the Welsh are friendly, but the Irish are fabulous. - Bonnie Tyler
I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt. - Edna O'Brien
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge
I'm from durable stock. I'm made to work. I'm Irish. - Mary McCormack
Irish Alzheimer's - you forget everything except the grudges. - Unknown
Dublin University contains the cream of Ireland - rich and thick. - Samuel Beckett
In Ireland, a writer is looked upon as a failed conversationalist. - Unknown
We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill
Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans. - Bob Geldof
Yancy is actually a Native-American name, but I'm Irish. Go figure. - Yancy Butler
I've heard some duff Irish accents. The worst must be Mickey Rourke. - James Nesbitt
Like an Irishman's obligation, all on the one side, and always yours. - English saying
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Being Irish is very much a part of who I am. I take it everywhere with me. - Colin Farrell
What's the use of being Irish if the world doesn't break your heart? - Unknown
Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead
If you're Irish, it doesn't matter where you go - you'll find family. - Victoria Smurfit
Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness
The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers
I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe
My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey
I'm not a walking extra in a Chekhov play; I'm no Slavic gloom or Irish gloom. - Orson Welles
We Irish will never achieve anything; but we are the greatest talkers since the Greeks. - Oscar Wilde
I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly
I'm Irish. That means I'm Catholic. But, truth is, now I'm a retired Christian. - Peter O'Toole
The Irish are the only men who know how to cry for the dirty polluted blood of all the world. - Norman Mailer
The Irish do not want anyone to wish them well; they want everyone to wish their enemies ill. - Harold Nicolson
The trouble with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, with absolutely no talent. - Hugh Leonard
I have a difficult time doing an Irish accent; even now, it kind of fades slowly into Scottish. - Robin Williams
I think the genetics of being Irish are that you sort of prefer when it's rainy and cloudy. - Kate Flannery
Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
Definition of an Irish fact: That which tells you not what is the case but what you want to hear. - Hugh Kenner
What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland
I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie
That's the Irish people all over - they treat a joke as a serious thing, and a serious thing as a joke. - Sean O'Casey
I'm a big fan of the Irish accent. After a couple of drinks, I start to get a bit of an Irish lilt, too. - Emily Ratajkowski
In 1953 there were two ways for an Irish Catholic boy to impress his parents: become a priest or attend Notre Dame. - Phil Donahue
If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde
The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad.
For all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad. - G K Chesterton
Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats
It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan
I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson
Irish & St. Patrick’s Day
Going Green for Ireland
Habby Sin Pad-Riggs Dey!
Irish Blessings and Sayings
Irish Sky Garden Crater
Irish Weather Forecasting
St. Patrick’s Day Joe-ks
St. Patrick’s Dog
Teddy Bear Dance
What’s Under The Kilt?
Loch-Risti Weather Forecasting Stone
Hospital Gown Insurance
Mobile Swamp Home
Circle Stroke Bikes
Spiderman Face Cup
Tick, Tick Good Buddy
Redneck Backhoe Operator
Shanty Town, New Zealand - Potty Pic
Modern Love Affair