Webster’s First Dictionary

An alternative to talking to the wife





How to get along with your wife

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Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Tis brief, my lord... as woman's love. - William Shakespeare

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Getting married is an incredible act of hopefulness. - Ashley Judd

Would a lion cheat on his wife? No, but a Tiger Would. - Unknown

No man should plant more garden than his wife can hoe. - Old Saying

He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original. - Alice Cooper

Now a soft kiss; Aye, by that kiss, I vow an endless bliss. - John Keats

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

A husband's conjungal and a wife's convivial obligation - Archie Bunker

Honesty is probably the sexiest thing a man can give to a woman. - Debra Messing

Her mother was a cultivated woman - she was born in a greenhouse. - Spike Milligan

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. - Oscar Wilde

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

I met my wife on a ferry boat, and when we landed she gave me the slip. - Groucho Marx

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

Never marry anyone you could not sit next to during a three-day bus trip. - Roger Ebert

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

A consultant is a man who knows 147 ways to make love, but doesn't know any women. - Unknown

A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite, and a woman who moralizes is usually plain. - Oscar Wilde

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas

The expression a woman wears on her face is far more important than the clothes she wears on her back. - Dale Carnegie

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age; a woman who would tell one would tell one anything. - Oscar Wilde

A wise man will never tell his wife to keep quiet. He will tell her she looks beautiful with her mouth closed. - Unknown

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

We women know how to take care of everybody so well. But the one person we have written out of the equation is us. - Suze Orman

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler

Of the two lots, the woman's lot of perpetual motherhood, and the man's of perpetual babyhood, I prefer the man's. - Bernard Shaw


see also   Language,  Marriage  &  Relationship  Sections
3 Stages Of A Man’s Life
4 Stages Of Life
A Man’s Life
A Woman’s Hands
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
“Female Speak” Translation
Flower Shop For Men
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
Understanding Women
Until We Understand Women
When Men Shop For Groceries

 

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15-Jul-2018