Colorectal Exam For Dogs

If dogs were veterinarians



Examing a dog's stool sample

QuotaBills
A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield


see also   Doctor,  Dog  &  Hospital  Sections
Acceptable Doctors Sign
Car Surgeon
Colon Celery
Colorectal Surgeon Praise
Constipated Mathematician
Dog Proctologist
Exhausting Gyne Work
Fart Facts
First Proctologist Exam (PG)
German Flatulence Control
Menopause Sucks
One Wee Scottish Farty
Proctologist Call
Proctologist’s Second-Hand Prescription
Psychiatrist’s Patient Advice
Singing Gynecologist

 

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20-Aug-2017