joe-ks.com

Church Signs
Signs of religious times

A clear conscience makes a soft pillow.
A man’s character is like a fence. It cannot be strengthened by whitewash.
A miser is a rich pauper.
Ask about our pray-as-you-go plan.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
Beat the Christmas rush, come to church this Sunday!
Can’t sleep? Try counting your blessings.
Christians, keep the faith... But not from others!
Come early for a good Backseat.
Come in and have your faith lifted.
Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!
Come in and let us prepare you for your finals.
Come in. We’re prayer conditioned.
Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is love, but the retirement benefits are out of this world!
Delay is preferable to error.
Don’t give up. Moses was once a basket case!
Don’t wait for the hearse to take you to Church.
“Don't make me come down there” - God.
Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives.
Everything you always wanted to know about heaven and hell but were afraid to ask.
Fall back into worship. [Autumnal message]
Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily.
“For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.” [Headline for a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed]
Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!
God answers kneemail.
God so loved the world that He did not send a committee.
Home Church - For Members Only. Trespassers Will Be Baptized.
How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?
I was going to waste, but Jesus recycled me.
If some people lived up to their ideals they would be stooping.
If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.
If you do not want to reap the fruits of sin stay out of the devil’s orchard.
If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.
If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
In the dark? Follow the Son.
It is unlikely there’ll ever be a reduction in the wages of sin.
It wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.
It’s hard to stumble when you’re down on your knees.
K-mart is not the only saving place.
Life has many choices - For Eternity, two. What’s yours?
Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
May is God’s apology for February.
Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive.
No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace.
No Jesus - No Peace, Know Jesus - Know Peace!
No matter how much you nurse a grudge it won’t get better.
Our arms are the only ones God has to hug His children.
Patience is the ability to stand something as long as it happens to the other fellow.
People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
Pray up in advance.
Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary.
Prevent truth decay. Brush up on your Bible.
Reputation is what people think about you. Character is what people know you are.
Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.
Satan subtracts and divides. God multiplies and multiplies.
Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here.
Seven days without prayer makes one weak.
Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.
Soul food served here.
Start living to beat hell.
The best vitamin for a Christian is B1.
The wages of sin is death. Repent before payday.
This is a ch__ch. What is missing?
Tithe if you love Jesus! Anyone can honk!
To belittle is to be little.
Trouble sleeping? We have sermons - come hear one.
Try Jesus. If you don’t like Him, the devil will always take you back.
Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.
Under same management for over 2000 years.
Wal-Mart isn’t the only saving place!
We hold sit-in demonstrations every Sunday.
We should be more concerned with the Rock Of Ages, instead of the age of rocks.
What on earth are you doing for heaven’s sake?
What part of “THOU SHALT NOT” don’t you understand?
When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right.
Will it take six strong pall-bearers to bring you back?
Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due.
You are not too bad to come in. You are not too good to stay out.
You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving.
You think it’s hot HERE? [At an Arizona Church in August]

When the restaurant next to the Lutheran Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, “Open Sundays.”
The Church reciprocated with its own message: “We are open on Sundays, too.”

A singing group called “The Resurrection” was scheduled to sing at a Church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, “The Resurrection is postponed.”


see also   Religious  &  Sign   Sections
All Dogs Go To Heaven
Biblical Humour
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Devil Sky
Garden of Eat’En
God Darts
Judas Asparagus
Moses As A Lifeguard
Moses’ Headache Relief - the Sequel
Moses’ USB Tablets
Organ Donor
Original Homeland Security - 2nd Amendment
Prayer Conditioning
Sundae Sermon
Sunday Weather Forecast
Uplifting Church
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

Searching for two pots of gold
Double Rainbow
Upset about slow newspaper delivery?
Sunday Paper
Hitler at Family Game Night
Nahtzee
Little Johnny loved stare contests with the dog
I Can Still Kiss You
Adding special ingredients to the menu
Church Dinner
Doubles as a fishing boat with fins on the water
59 Chev Boat
Carrier pigeons that were faster than speeding bullets
Urgent World War I Message
Costa Concordia ship disguise to enter Canadian waters
An Iceberg Floated Into Town
The hazards of vertical electronic traffic lights
Walk Sign Timing
It's all in the hands...
Family Hands
Designer bed toppings for kids
Chocolate Bed
Walking into a feeding frenzy in the house
Crocodile Floor
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

27-May-2012

QR Code

G'Oldies

Baby Suit
Tornado's Path of Destr ...
Texas Bakery
A Man's Grill
Employee Of The Month
Bucket Nap
Soccer Overpass
Squirrel Gymnast
Tetris Construction
Bear Surveillance
Duct Tape Plane
Rock-In Chair
Last Ice Fishing Trip
Pilot's Seeing Eye Dog
Bricklayer’s Accident ...
Outdoor Pool
Water Walkers - Part I
Wannabe Mini
Can You Find the Hidden ...
Celebrate Womanhood!
Airless See-Through Tir ...
Rush Hour Non-Traffic
Lost Uncle
Mom Posting
Home In A Box
Boulder and Bolder By T ...
Oklahoma's New Posted S ...
Wayne's Fish
'Outside The Box' Juggl ...
Flight Downer
Underwater Golf
Reverse Teaching
Caber Toss: Careful Whe ...
Texas Rain Gauge
Redneck Campfire
Toy Recall
Justice For All
Fish Walker
Bluenecks: Revenge of t ...
CIL Fisherman
In-Debted For Life
3 Stages Of A Man's Lif ...
Men Are Like Horoscopes
Laptop Security
Arm Chair
How Not To Cut Your Wif ...
Never Run a Red Light!
Chinese Cough Drops: A- ...
Camouflage Face
Calling In Sick - Snow ...
iAbacus
Old People Never Die, T ...
Advertisement Potpourri
Bear Protection
How Many Faces Do You S ...
Sinus Remedy - How To C ...
Hydrant Dog: Rise and F ...
Don't Play With Fire
Ritz Nursing Home
5 Steps to a Healthy Di ...
Mac Shoe
Generous Judge's Divorc ...
Watch For Moose On Road
GhetToes
Y’Allbonics
Out Of Estrogen - Make ...
Alberta Hood Ornament
Orca Season
Ice Boat
Moon Landing
Redneck Swimming Pools
Sign Model
Two Face
Redneck Special Forces
How To Speak Kiwi
Poor Fishing Day
1907 to 2007: Century o ...
July 4th Balloon
Case of the Pregnant La ...
Egg Walk
Eat Your Vegetables
Drain Swimmer
Roman Emergency
Sam 'n Ella's Chicken B ...
Biker's Fifth Wheel Tra ...
Rubik's Cube Jigsaw Puz ...
Lap Dog (Wrap Version)
Sewer Fishing Forbidden
Praying & Preying Manti ...
Guitar Throne
Barthoven
Gopher's Phone Booth
Florida Moves Out Of Hu ...
Best Fairy Tale
Environmental Protectio ...
Taking No Chance with t ...
Dear Deer Yarn
Jockey Dementia
Miss Chernobyl 2004
Back Bard
Stoolbus
'Hooked On Clothes' Cat
Bear Praise