Why Women Don’t Let Men Bathe Kids
A man’s “Clean House” policy




QuotaBills
Baby lying in the bassinoot. - Archie Bunker

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: eat out. - Phyllis Diller

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

You know what's cool? My kids think I'm ordinary. - Michael J. Fox

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex. - Bill Maher

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove. - Groucho Marx

If we tried to sink the past beneath our feet, be sure the future would not stand it. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Inaction will cause a man to sink into the slough of despond and vanish without a trace. - Farley Mowat

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

I'm going to smile, and my smile will sink down into your pupils, and heaven knows what it will become. - Jean-Paul Sartre

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Sensitive love letters are my specialty: "Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You. P.S. I'm gay." - Homer Simpson

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis. - Zig Ziglar

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

Whenever I have a spare second, I'm in the kitchen whipping up a batch of cookies. I make a mean batch of chocolate chippers. - Karlie Kloss

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


see also   Kids  Section
Why Men Need Post-It Notes
Why Men Shouldn’t Babysit
Why Men Shouldn’t Take Messages

 

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20-Feb-2019