[Since the Pledge of Allegiance & The Lord’s Prayer are not allowed in most public schools anymore because the word “God” is mentioned... kids in Arizona wrote the following “NEW” School prayer...]
Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.
If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.
Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That’s no offense; it’s a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.
For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God’s name is prohibited by the state.
We’re allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They’ve outlawed guns, but “FIRST” the Bible.
To quote the Good Book, makes me liable.
We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the “unwed daddy,” our Senior King.
It’s “inappropriate” to teach right from wrong,
We’re taught that such “judgments” don’t belong.
We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments aren’t allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.
It’s scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school’s a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
In God we trust. - U.S. Currency Motto
I am an atheist... thank God. - Dave Allen
You cannot serve God and Mammon. - Bible
God has always been hard on the poor. - Jean Paul Marat
Science is the record of dead religions. - Oscar Wilde
Black holes are where God divided by zero. - Steven Wright
Faith is believing what you know ain't so. - Mark Twain
Without a doubt, it is the land God gave to Cain. - Mordecai Richler
Chocolate: God's apology to women for periods. - Unknown
The atheist religion don't believe in the bible. - Archie Bunker
There is nothing more important than appearing to be religious. - Niccolo Machiavelli
The things which are impossible with men are possible with God. - Luke 18:27
In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce. - Francesco Caracciolo
I am as bad as the worst, but, thank God, I am as good as the best. - Walt Whitman
If there's one thing I know it's God does love a good joke. - Hugh Elliott
In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you. - Leo Tolstoy
You can do very little with faith, but you can do nothing without it. - Samuel Butler
Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God. - Diana Robinson
All effort is in the last analysis sustained by faith that it is worth making. - Ordway Tead
A blank piece of paper is God's way of telling us how hard it is to be God. - Sidney Sheldon
To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V
No man can be called friendless when he has God and the companionship of good books. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning
When you pray, rather let your heart be without words than your words without heart. - John Bunyan
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
When we talk to God, we're praying. When God talks to us, we're schizophrenic. - Jane Wagner
Sometimes I get to places just when God's ready to have somebody click the shutter. - Ansel Adams
You must live with people to know their problems, and live with God in order to solve them. - P.T. Forsyth
I always distrust people who know so much about what God wants them to do to their fellows. - Susan B Anthony
Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson
Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope or confidence. - Helen Keller
Before you speak, it is necessary for you to listen, for God speaks in the silence of the heart. - Mother Teresa
I know why the sun never sets on the British Empire: God wouldn't trust an Englishman in the dark. - Duncan Spaeth
The task of organized religion is not to prove that God was in the 1st century, but that he is in the 20th. - S.H. Miller
Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns
Man is more interesting than men. God made him and not them in his image. Each one is more precious than all. - Andre Gide
None of us knows what might happen even the next minute, yet still we go forward. Because we trust. Because we have Faith. - Paulo Coelho
The meme for blind faith secures its own perpetuation by the simple unconscious expedient of discouraging rational inquiry. - Richard Dawkins
God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm. - William Cowper
Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. - Galileo Galilei
Religious & School Sections
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An Evening Prayer
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Da End Iss Near
Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
God’s Little Instructions
Halo to the Holy Dog
Job Interview With God
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Letters to God - From Children
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The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
Ice Cream Rose
Bolt Action Door
You Want Me To Do What?
Fear Of Light
South Africa Taxi
Leave Toes Outside
China Road Load
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Chinese Road Rocks
Lunch Break on a Hot Day
Chinese Deer Hunter
Redneck Chinese Food
Shakespeare - The Early Years