[Since the Pledge of Allegiance & The Lord’s Prayer are not allowed in most public schools anymore because the word “God” is mentioned... kids in Arizona wrote the following “NEW” School prayer...]
Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.
If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.
Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That’s no offense; it’s a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.
For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God’s name is prohibited by the state.
We’re allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They’ve outlawed guns, but “FIRST” the Bible.
To quote the Good Book, makes me liable.
We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the “unwed daddy,” our Senior King.
It’s “inappropriate” to teach right from wrong,
We’re taught that such “judgments” don’t belong.
We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments aren’t allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.
It’s scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school’s a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
In God we trust. - U.S. Currency Motto
Coincidences are spiritual puns. - G K Chesterton
Conscience is God present in man. - Victor Hugo
A good example is the best sermon. - Unknown
God, please save me from your followers! - Unknown
You had no faith to lose and you know it. - Bob Dylan
Faith held solely is the beginning of action. - Unknown
We have to pray on behalf of those who do not pray. - Mother Teresa
God depends on us. It is through us that God is achieved. - Andre Gide
He has all the characteristics of a god - except loyalty. - Sam Houston
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. - Woody Allen
What is faith unless it is to believe what you do not see? - St. Augustine
If God wanted us to fly, he would have given us air tickets. - Mel Brooks
Faith is the daring of the soul to go farther than it can see. - William Newton Clark
God made rainy days so gardeners could get the housework done. - Unknown
My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield
It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain
I can't believe that God put us on this earth to be ordinary. - Lou Holtz
I am as bad as the worst, but, thank God, I am as good as the best. - Walt Whitman
God doesn't require us to succeed; he only requires that you try. - Mother Teresa
Without faith, a man can do nothing; with it, all things are possible. - William Osler
God grants us an uncommon life to the degree we surrender our common one. - Max Lucado
Kind hearts are more than coronets
An simple faith than Norman blood. - Alfred Lord Tennyson
Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. - Martin Luther King, Jr.
God does not care about our mathematical difficulties. He integrates empirically. - Albert Einstein
Never, never, never join a movement that persecutes people because of their faith. - Adrian Rodgers
Every evening I turn worries over to God. He's going to be up all night anyway. - Mary C. Crowley
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
When we talk to God, we're praying. When God talks to us, we're schizophrenic. - Jane Wagner
In Islam, the legislative power and competence to establish laws belong exclusively to God. - Ayatollah Khomeini
Do not blame God for having created the tiger, but thank him for not having given it wings. - Indian Proverb
I love these little people; and it is not a slight thing when they, who are so fresh from God, love us. - Charles Dickens
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present. - Bil Keane
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever. - Mark Twain
The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie
Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in Church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. - Fred Allen
It is difficult to make a man miserable while he feels worthy of himself and claims kindred to the great God who made him. - Abraham Lincoln
But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most? - Mark Twain
When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? - Bible
Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell
Religious & School Sections
Ain’t Peter's Place
All Dogs Go To Heaven
An Evening Prayer
Breakable Postal Package
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Da End Iss Near
Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
God’s Little Instructions
Halo to the Holy Dog
Job Interview With God
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Letters to God - From Children
Please Help My Car
The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
Rural Free Delivery
Fractured Foot or Hand?
March of the Penguins - Canadian Version
The Ass Family
Proof of Global Warming