Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand

How to help cash flow problems at a monastery


A monastery in the English countryside was having a hard time with its cash flow because of the dwindling number of monks available to help with all the work.

Then one day two of the monks, who had been discussing the problem, suggested they open a fish and chips stand down on the highway, right next to a scenic vista area popular with tourists. The other monks agreed, and the two put up the stand.

One day a tourist who wanted to offer a compliment asked the monk on duty, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No, sir,” retorted the brother, “I’m the chip monk.”


QuotaBills
My true religion is Kindness. - Dalai Lama

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Unknown

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

That Meathead calls me a religious phonetic. - Archie Bunker

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

Love is the net where hearts are caught like fish. - Muhammad Ali

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Don't they get afraid, then?
They have a religion for that. - Ray Bradbury

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. - George Bernard Shaw

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

Give me a couple of pages of the Bible, and I'll give you a picture. - Cecil B. DeMille

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

A pretty good test of a man's religion is how it affects his pocketbook. - Francis James Grimke

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. - Unknown

I don't see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn't get breast implants. - Carrie Prejean

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. - Charles Caleb Colton

Let us build a church so great that those who come after us may thing us mad to have attempted it. - Unknown

Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong, even though they say it's okay in the Bible. - Homer Simpson

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis

An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in Church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. - Fred Allen

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb


see also   Christmas  &  Religious  Sections
Celebate or Celebrate?
Chipwrecked
Friar Thumper
Gambling Chips
Greek Monk
Monk On A Rope
Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
Tiny Monks

 

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16-Jan-2018