Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand

How to help cash flow problems at a monastery


A monastery in the English countryside was having a hard time with its cash flow because of the dwindling number of monks available to help with all the work.

Then one day two of the monks, who had been discussing the problem, suggested they open a fish and chips stand down on the highway, right next to a scenic vista area popular with tourists. The other monks agreed, and the two put up the stand.

One day a tourist who wanted to offer a compliment asked the monk on duty, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No, sir,” retorted the brother, “I’m the chip monk.”


QuotaBills
All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Unknown

Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

That Meathead calls me a religious phonetic. - Archie Bunker

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

The Bible tells us to forgive our enemies, not our friends. - Margot Asquith

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

Give me a couple of pages of the Bible, and I'll give you a picture. - Cecil B. DeMille

A pretty good test of a man's religion is how it affects his pocketbook. - Francis James Grimke

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

The Bible does not give us a road map for life, but it does give us a compass. - Gordon S. Jackson

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

The church is close, but the road is icey. The tavern is far, but I will walk carefully. - Russian Proverb

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. - Unknown

I don't see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn't get breast implants. - Carrie Prejean

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner

He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis

Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Whenever you enter into it take with you your all. - Kahlil Gibran

The Bible, if ya read it you'd know. It's right in the beginning there, in the Book of Generous. - Archie Bunker

Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong, even though they say it's okay in the Bible. - Homer Simpson

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

I think it's my adventure, my trip, my journey, and I guess my attitude is, let the chips fall where they may. - Leonard Nimoy

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump

Every sort of energy and endurance, of courage and capacity for handling life's evils, is set free in those who have religious faith. - William James

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Ultimately, America's answer to the intolerant man is diversity, the very diversity which our heritage of religious freedom has inspired. - Robert F. Kennedy


see also   Christmas  &  Religious  Sections
Celebate or Celebrate?
Chipwrecked
Friar Thumper
Gambling Chips
Greek Monk
Monk On A Rope
Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
Tiny Monks

 

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20-Nov-2017