Butt Dust
Visiting Preacher’s rapturous sermon
What happens when you try to do something without God

A visiting minister decided to begin his sermon with an opening prayer.

“Dear Lord,” he began with arms extended and a rapturous look on his upturned face, “Without you we are but dust...”

He would have continued, but at that moment a little girl leaned over to her mother and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, “Mommy, what is butt dust?”

Church was pretty much over at that point...


QuotaBills
Excuse My Dust - Dorothy Parker

Dust thou art, to dust returnest. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

A good example is the best sermon. - Unknown

When your dreams turn to dust, vacuum. - Desmond Tutu

Superstition is the religion of feeble minds. - Edmund Burke

Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. - The Book of Common Prayer

At my house, Dust is a noun, not a verb. - Unknown

Dust is a protective coating for fine furniture. - Mario Buatta

The atheist religion don't believe in the bible. - Archie Bunker

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. - Pablo Picasso

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. - Arnold Haultain

There is nothing more important than appearing to be religious. - Niccolo Machiavelli

No minister ever stood, or could stand, against public opinion. - Robert Peel

For the man who prays in his heart, the whole world is a church. - Sylvain of Athos

No sinner is ever saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon. - Mark Twain

The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls. - Pablo Picasso

Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind. - Albert Einstein

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

In this religious order has flourished and is revitalized the order of Knighthood. - Knights Templar

To be religious is to have a life that flows with the presence of the extraordinary. - Ann Belford Ulanov

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

I definitely want my son Brooklyn christened, but I don't know into what religion yet. - David Beckham

Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

Let us build a church so great that those who come after us may thing us mad to have attempted it. - Unknown

If I were ever prosecuted for my religion, I truly hope there would be enough evidence to convict me. - John Wooden

An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

You must mind and not lower the Church in people's eyes by seeming to be frightened about it for such a little thing. - George Eliot

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

He who begins with Metaphysics will not only become confused in matters of religion, but will fall into complete infidelity. - Maimonides

I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump


see also   Religious  Section
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Little White Lies @ the Ladies’ Bake Sale

 

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19-Jul-2018