Government Measurement

Flagpole math for labourers


Ray and Bob, two Government maintenance guys, were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.

A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.

“We’re supposed to find the height of the flagpole”, said Bob, “but we don’t have a ladder.”

The woman said, “Hand me that wrench out of your toolbox.”
She loosened a few bolts, then laid the pole down. She then took a tape measure from their toolbox, took a measurement and announced, “Eighteen feet, six inches” and walked away.

Ray shook his head and laughed. “Well, ain’t that just like a ‘Miss-know-it-all’ woman?” he said. “We need the height and she gives us the length!”

Ray and Bob are still working for the Government.


QuotaBills
Skill and confidence are an unconquered army. - George Herbert

Confidence is the hinge on the door to success. - Mary O'Hare Dumas

Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence. - Joseph Krutch

I rate enthusiasm even above professional skill. - Edward Appleton

The great hope of society is individual character. - William Ellery Channing

Habits form character, and character forms destiny. - James Allen

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. - Louis Nizer

Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

It is easy to be nice, even to an enemy - from lack of character. - Dag Hammarskjold

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character. - Oscar Levant

I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes. - Leo Durocher

Leaders inspire. They aren't assigned leadership. They command it. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Without initiative, leaders are simply workers in leadership positions. - Bo Bennett

The art of leadership is saying no, not yes. It is very easy to say yes. - Tony Blair

Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there. - John Wooden

Hot lead can be almost as effective coming from a linotype as from a firearm. - John O'Hara

Anything less than a commitment to excellence is an acceptance of mediocrity. - Vince Lombardi

Excellence is not a singular act but a habit. You are what you do repeatedly. - Shaquille O'Neal

Making mistakes reveals human nature. How one deals with them reveals character. - Unknown

The most important persuasion tool you have in your entire arsenal is integrity. - Zig Ziglar

Character is the result of two things: Mental attitude and the way we spend our time. - Elbert Green Hubbard

A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's. - Jean Paul Richter

I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government. - Woody Allen

My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle

One who understands much displays a greater simplicity of character than one who understands little. - Alexander Chase

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

A man of character does not expect to be liked by everyone, nor does he worry about being liked by anyone. - Unknown

Yoga is invigoration in relaxation. Freedom in routine. Confidence through self control. Energy within and energy without. - Ymber Delecto

I would solve a lot of literary problems just thinking about a character in the subway, where you can't do anything anyway. - Toni Morrison

Leadership is all about caring, daring and sharing. Caring for people, Daring to Act fearlessly, and Sharing the success with all. - Sujit Lalwani

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

Faced with crisis, the man of character falls back on himself. He imposes his own stamp of action, takes responsibility for it, makes it his own. - Charles De Gaulle


see also   Dubm,  Feminist,  Government  &  Work  Sections
City Work Crew’s Slow Day
Government Snow Plow
Management Team - Leading by Example
Men At Work
New Manager’s Crisis Envelopes
The New Flagpole
Tired Flagpole

 

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26-Sep-2017