Government Measurement

Flagpole math for labourers


Ray and Bob, two Government maintenance guys, were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.

A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.

“We’re supposed to find the height of the flagpole”, said Bob, “but we don’t have a ladder.”

The woman said, “Hand me that wrench out of your toolbox.”
She loosened a few bolts, then laid the pole down. She then took a tape measure from their toolbox, took a measurement and announced, “Eighteen feet, six inches” and walked away.

Ray shook his head and laughed. “Well, ain’t that just like a ‘Miss-know-it-all’ woman?” he said. “We need the height and she gives us the length!”

Ray and Bob are still working for the Government.


QuotaBills
Example is leadership. - Albert Schweitzer

Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

When you're riding lead, don't spit. - Unknown

Life always takes on the character of its motive. - J.G. Holland

The great hope of society is individual character. - William Ellery Channing

Character is not given to us; we build it ourselves. - Mabel Hale

If men were angels, no government would be necessary. - James Madison

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

A man's manner to a certain extent indicates his character. - Samuel Smiles

I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes. - Leo Durocher

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

On average it takes 10,000 hours of practice to truly master a skill. - Malcolm Gladwell

While your circumstances are beyond your control, your character is not. - John C Maxwell

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

In our world, more often the truth is 'Money talks and integrity walks.' - Bill Welker

If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere. - Frank A. Clark

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

Getting results through people is a skill that cannot be learned in the classroom. - J Paul Getty

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini

Confidence is like a dragon where, for every head cut off, two more heads grow back. - Criss Jami

No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government. - Woody Allen

My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy

Leadership is all about influence and everything rises and falls on leadership... everything. - John C Maxwell

Leadership: The art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it. - Dwight D Eisenhower

Ninety-two percent of the stuff told you in confidence you couldn't get anyone else to listen to. - Franklin P. Adams

Our character is but the stamp on our souls of the free choices of good and evil we have made through life. - John C. Geikie

Leadership is the special quality which enables people to stand up and pull the rest of us over the horizon. - James L Fisher

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself. - Cicero

I would solve a lot of literary problems just thinking about a character in the subway, where you can't do anything anyway. - Toni Morrison

When it comes to housework the one thing no book of household management can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why. - Katharine Whitehorn

Expect to make some mistakes when you try new and different approaches. Sometimes colossal failures lead to spectacular successes. - Harvey Mackay

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers


see also   Dubm,  Feminist,  Government  &  Work  Sections
City Work Crew’s Slow Day
Government Snow Plow
Management Team - Leading by Example
Men At Work
New Manager’s Crisis Envelopes
The New Flagpole
Tired Flagpole

 

Fire Distinguisher

Age Comes With Convenience

Daily Trivia B

Frog Tape

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Tree Carpet

Our Aim

Scuba Hiking

Whale Photobomb

Smoking Hot Body

Dog Biscuits

Banjo Mute

Cloud Swing

Bread Tug Of War

Arabic Sudoku Puzzles C

Modern Stick Family

Buddha Pear

OCD Floor Tiles

Shoe Bath

9 Months On The Inside
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

18-Nov-2017