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Description
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(revised) |
Seller assumes all responsibility for listing this
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This is an utterly horrible dead C90. I
acquired it because I thought the engine might fit in a Honda Dax 70
I was restoring. I then found that this year of C90 engine won't
fit. Oh well.
Picture at: http://www.joe-ks.com/images/C90.jpg - thanks to the Joe-kster @ joe.ks.com
It's been in a leaky shed for at least a decade. It's quite
disgusting. It's red, fading to pink on some plastic parts, and with
a fine patina of matching ferrous oxide. It's complete, except for
the exhaust which was so decayed it fell off when I was moving it.
The legshields are cracked. No documents and no keys. The engine has
compression and turns over, but the speedo mileage of 46,000
suggests that it was used by a Knowledge Boy with severe learning
difficulties.
Speaking of which, this is a re-listing because the winning
bidder last time was a decerebrate turnip who was able to click on
buttons and hit the numbers keys, but unable to read web pages, and
didn't realise that he was 200 miles away. "I dint no (sic) where
you lived" read his email. Well done, astrogig989: in addition to
having the saddest username on Ebeh, you've now got a feedback
rating of minus one and a Non-Paying Bidder stripe against your
record. Welcome to our Quadrant of the Galaxy. Beep. Yes, we play
rough on Planet Earth sometimes. The next-placed bidder swore blind
he wanted it, but he turned out to live 120 miles away and he's been
giving me the run-around as well. Irritated? Me? Just a tad, yes.
For the benefit of anyone else who has the navigational skills of a
pigeon with a magnet strapped to its forehead, this bike is in
Abbotsford, east Vancouver. For the Yanks, that's Vancouver, Canada,
near Alaska. Not Vancouver, Washington, eh.
What's it worth? Spare parts only, or maybe the basis for a field
bike. It really isn't worth restoring as a road bike. Besides the
engine, things like side panels, electrical components, forks,
mirrors, levers, lights, switches, side panels, etc etc are all
worth having. It even has a rack, roughly finished in Dulux White,
which suggests that our trainee cab driver did a spot of painting
and decorating on the side.
Starting price is 99 cents and no reserve. You will need a van or a
trailer or the stamina to push it a long way. I can deliver within a
reasonable distance for 50 cents/mile but unless you're only a few miles
away (are you reading this, timewasters?) it'll probably be rather
more than the bike is worth.
I'll want it taken away within one week of auction end.
Timewasters and/or people who tell me they can't pick it up for a
month, or haven't got transport at the moment, will find that Planet
Earth's Alien Feedback Division can be a hostile place. Beep.
On
11-Nov-03 at 16:20:32 GMT, seller added the following
information:
Look, what is it with some people? Why is it, when you put up
a bike that's in a state, and tell everyone it's crap, and start the
bidding at 99 cents, ferChrissakes, do you get emails like this one:
"I could offer $60 if you would consider delivery. The reason is
that I am going on holiday from Friday the 14th of November so will
be around home tomorrow Wednesday and Thursday the 12th and 13th.
Hence I will not be able to bid or collect the bike while I am
away. Currently I ride a ZZR1100 and am looking for very cheap local
transport in the winter months. Condition not really important
to me."
If you can't take delivery, or you aren't local, don't bid and
don't waste my time with emails. And can't you read? This bike is
like Monty Python's parrot. It wouldn't voom if you put 50,000 volts
through it. The engine may be OK - I've no idea - but the rest of it
is a pile of poo.
And this is an auction, right? I've no intention of pissing off
genuine buyers on my stuff by yanking my goods because someone as
dim as candle in a Guinness bottle thinks he can change my mind by
promising cash. I've heard that one before. In fact, I've heard it
on this very C90.
For the record: winning bidder gets it, and then drags it away
pronto before the neighbours claim it's reducing local property
values..
On
11-Nov-03 at 20:58:25 GMT, seller added the following
information:
dandick, you are mad. I trust you're genuine, but the fact
that (at the time of writing this) you've bid $26 for this
suggests that you only have twice the brains of astrogig989, who bid
$51 before the smear left by his finger on the screen stopped at the
point: Location, Abbotsford, British Columbia/Vancouver. And as astrogig989
has a certifiable IQ in single figures, this is not a good sign. If
you win this, and then let me down, I shall send the SAS to put
itching powder in your underpants drawer.
Same goes for other comedians, except that my vengeance will be
worse as the bids increase. They're already 25 cents more than this
thing is worth.
On
13-Nov-03 at 21:53:37 GMT, seller added the following
information:
Wonderful. So the Feckwit Quotient is increasing. I have a
theory that the cheaper and crappier an auction item, the greater
number of imbeciles it attracts. The current high bidder has just
emailed me to say he made a mistake in his bidding.
Jeepers. All you have to do is read Ebeh's instructions, click on a
button, and type in a figure. There are people out there who, on
this basis, can't even use a microwave oven without a quantifiable
risk of burning their hands off at the wrist.
And from the sound of his username, he's 250 miles away. But hey,
maybe he was conceived on a wet and wind-blasted island off
North Wales? twitbagosarus, I'm cancelling your bid unless, as politely
requested, you get back to me with full name, address, contact
numbers and an assurance that you're not as dim as your illiterate
email suggests.
In fact, I've just checked the bid history. I should have done
that earlier. Lookathat! Four bidders, and three of them zero
feedback. The bad news for you, dandick, is that if I bar the
current geezer, this bike is going to be your problem.
On
14-Nov-03 at 12:33:37 GMT, seller added the following
information:
And from the darkness of a cold, hard solar system the
anti-Feckwit Division of the Intergalactic Ebeh Council sent a lone
battlecruiser to nuke twitbagosarus's bids, because although he did
indeed get back to me, he did not furnish any of the information
requested, and showed a painful ignorance of the way Ebeh's bidding
system works. Sorry, an'all that, twitbagosarus, but I suggest you RTFM.
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