Teacher: “What is the area of a circle, Bubba - Pi R^2?”
Bubba: “Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square.”
Teacher: “What is a proof?”
Bubba: “One-half percent of alcohol.”
Mathematics has beauties of its own. - J.W.A. Young
Revolutions never occur in mathematics. - Michael Crowe
I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost
Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert
I've won at every level, except college and pro. - Shaquille O'Neal
Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith
A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell
Mathematics is the science which uses easy words for hard ideas. - James Roy Newman
Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke
I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump
In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann
Like the crest of a peacock, so is mathematics at the head of all knowledge. - Indian Proverb
Perhaps the most surprising thing about mathematics is that it is so surprising. - E.C. Titchmarsh
I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. - Woody Allen
For the things of this world cannot be made known without a knowledge of mathematics. - Roger Bacon
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey
There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown
For the execution of the voyage to the Indies, I did not make use of intelligence, mathematics or maps. - Christopher Columbus
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term. - Mark Twain
I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick
The most painful thing about mathematics is how far away you are from being able to use it after you have learned it. - James Newman
In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right. - Jack Nicholson
Mathematics is indeed dangerous in that it absorbs students to such a degree that it dulls their senses to everything else. - Prinz zu Hohlenlohe-Ingelfingen Kraft
I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves
It is the studying you do after your school days that really counts. Otherwise, you know only that which everyone else knows. - Henry L. Doherty
The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal
Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown
Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell
My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt
When I finished school, I took one of those career-aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime. - Tim Cavanagh
I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann
Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer
I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen
Revolutions never occur in mathematics. - Michael Crowe
I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost
Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert
I've won at every level, except college and pro. - Shaquille O'Neal
Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith
A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell
Mathematics is the science which uses easy words for hard ideas. - James Roy Newman
Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke
I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump
In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann
Like the crest of a peacock, so is mathematics at the head of all knowledge. - Indian Proverb
Perhaps the most surprising thing about mathematics is that it is so surprising. - E.C. Titchmarsh
I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. - Woody Allen
For the things of this world cannot be made known without a knowledge of mathematics. - Roger Bacon
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey
There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown
For the execution of the voyage to the Indies, I did not make use of intelligence, mathematics or maps. - Christopher Columbus
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term. - Mark Twain
I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick
The most painful thing about mathematics is how far away you are from being able to use it after you have learned it. - James Newman
In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right. - Jack Nicholson
Mathematics is indeed dangerous in that it absorbs students to such a degree that it dulls their senses to everything else. - Prinz zu Hohlenlohe-Ingelfingen Kraft
I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves
It is the studying you do after your school days that really counts. Otherwise, you know only that which everyone else knows. - Henry L. Doherty
The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal
Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown
Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell
My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt
When I finished school, I took one of those career-aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime. - Tim Cavanagh
I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann
Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer
I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen
see also College, School & Redneck Sections
2 Pi Watch
Accurate Pie Chart
Apple Pi
Catholic Math
Cats and Backpacks
Cheat of the Year
Chocolate Math
Constipated Mathematician
Dancing Mathematician
Detroit High School - Math Proficiency Exam
Epic Pi
Ethiopian Math
Expandable Equation
Girlfriend Math
Hangman Math
Hot Dog Math
How Can This Be True, Math Nerds?
Illusive Dice
Kwik-Mart Math
Logic, Math & Reasoning Quotes
Long Math Class
Ma & Pa Math: 5 into 25 equals 14
Math Clock
Math Dice
Math in Africa
Math Mug
Math Puzzle
Math Riddle
Math Watch
Mathematician’s Truck
Mennonite Longhand Math
Phone Number Magic Trick
Pi Chart
Proof That 7 x 13 = 28
Snake Math
Teacher Arrested at Airport
WalMart Math
 One At A Time |  Life And Beer Are Very Similar |  Redneck Speed Bump |  Studley Tool Chest |  Shopping With Your Husband |
 PEI Weather |  Math Lab Bust |  Political Floor |  Redneck Winter Tires |  Fish Fingers |
 Costco Beach Towel |  Handwritting |  Down Under Statue |  Random Acts Of Kindness (RAK) Day |  Detroit Discovery |
 Spit Priorities |  Enjoy The View |  Locks Of Love |  So You Want A Day Off |  Save A Tree |
17-Feb-2019 |