Teacher: “What is the area of a circle, Bubba - Pi R^2?”
Bubba: “Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square.”
Teacher: “What is a proof?”
Bubba: “One-half percent of alcohol.”
Mathematics has beauties of its own. - J.W.A. Young
Mathematics: the only subject that counts. - Unknown
Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert
Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko
Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith
Math, it's a puzzle to me. I love figuring out puzzles. - Maya Lin
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell
Mathematics is the science which uses easy words for hard ideas. - James Roy Newman
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain
College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel
For the things of this world cannot be made known without a knowledge of mathematics. - Roger Bacon
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya
Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert
If everybody in the world dropped out of school, we would have a much more intelligent society. - Jaden Smith
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams
I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill
Mathematics is distinguished from all other sciences except only ethics, in standing in no need of ethics. - Charles Peirce
You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
Mathematics may be compared to a mill of exquisite workmanship, which grinds your stuff to any degree of fineness. - Thomas Huxley
There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan
I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves
Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok
It is the studying you do after your school days that really counts. Otherwise, you know only that which everyone else knows. - Henry L. Doherty
I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman
The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal
Mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know what we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true. - Rene Descartes
You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze
My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt
When I finished school, I took one of those career-aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime. - Tim Cavanagh
I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann
Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer
If it's green, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it has numbers, it's math. If it doesn't work, it's technology. - Unknown
Mathematics: the only subject that counts. - Unknown
Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert
Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko
Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith
Math, it's a puzzle to me. I love figuring out puzzles. - Maya Lin
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell
Mathematics is the science which uses easy words for hard ideas. - James Roy Newman
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain
College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel
For the things of this world cannot be made known without a knowledge of mathematics. - Roger Bacon
When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya
Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert
If everybody in the world dropped out of school, we would have a much more intelligent society. - Jaden Smith
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams
I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill
Mathematics is distinguished from all other sciences except only ethics, in standing in no need of ethics. - Charles Peirce
You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
Mathematics may be compared to a mill of exquisite workmanship, which grinds your stuff to any degree of fineness. - Thomas Huxley
There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan
I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves
Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok
It is the studying you do after your school days that really counts. Otherwise, you know only that which everyone else knows. - Henry L. Doherty
I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman
The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal
Mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know what we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true. - Rene Descartes
You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze
My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt
When I finished school, I took one of those career-aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime. - Tim Cavanagh
I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann
Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer
If it's green, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it has numbers, it's math. If it doesn't work, it's technology. - Unknown
see also College, School & Redneck Sections
2 Pi Watch
Accurate Pie Chart
Apple Pi
Catholic Math
Cats and Backpacks
Cheat of the Year
Chocolate Math
Constipated Mathematician
Dancing Mathematician
Detroit High School - Math Proficiency Exam
Epic Pi
Ethiopian Math
Expandable Equation
Girlfriend Math
Hangman Math
Hot Dog Math
How Can This Be True, Math Nerds?
Illusive Dice
Kwik-Mart Math
Logic, Math & Reasoning Quotes
Long Math Class
Ma & Pa Math: 5 into 25 equals 14
Math Clock
Math Dice
Math in Africa
Math Mug
Math Puzzle
Math Riddle
Math Watch
Mathematician’s Truck
Mennonite Longhand Math
Phone Number Magic Trick
Pi Chart
Proof That 7 x 13 = 28
Snake Math
Teacher Arrested at Airport
WalMart Math
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