John Deere Lawnmover
Why settle for a lawnmower when you can have a lawnmover?
For the busy executive - how to 'fly' through your chores!
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Captions from our readers...
“Ok,
now let's see... six lawns a second... This baby runs on grass trimmings...
Jeez! I'll have this 3.5 million dollar puppy paid off in two weeks!!!”
“EASILY
keeping up with the Jones!”
“It's
great to get the lawn cut in short order... but the cost of JP-4 Jet fuel is a
killer!”
“Marge
next door is going to flippin' KILL me! I just accidentally mowed down her
entire two acre garden!”
“OK,
OK... don't panic... I got the blades stopped... but where the heck are the
flippin' BRAKES!!!”
Ric
Mossip
“John
Deere announced today that, in a surprise move, it has decided to branch out
by adding an armament division...”
“The
ultimate tool for the ultimate multi-tasker: mow, mulch, weed, remove
stumps, remove ant beds, remove termites, dig that pool you've always
wanted, and get rid of your neighbor's annoying dog, all with one pass!”
“John
Deere: making war on weeds for over thirty years...”
Kirk
Lowry
“Ultimate
tool for the ultimate fool.”
Gabby Pierce
“Invented
by Bubba, Manufactured in Skeeter, WV.”
Lillian Cobb
“Nothing
tips like a Deere.”
Marlene Goodman
“He's
always flying high on grass.”
Ron Wells
“Runs like a deer?”
L.B. Scott
“I didn't want anything fancy...
just a PLANE lawnmower!”
William Weise
“Big Toys for Big Boys”
Elaine Powell
“She might have took away my car
keys, but she forgot about my ol' John Deer.”
Jill Coloske
“Redneck multi-tool double bladed
lawnmower, .50 cal minigun, sidewinder
rockets, and can opener. Mow your 1200 acre lawn or blow it up and try again next
year.”
Carl Weiler
“Moles,
no match for John Deeres new Limited Edition Xseries A10*, with heat-seeking out
front blades.
(*If purchased before march 08, pilot picture included)”
“John
Deere really will blow open a can of whoop-ass on your lawn!”
“I
hope its got emergency engine cut off on the seat...”
“Shooting
tin cans as target practice down the garden entered a new realm...”
“Can
you set auto-pilot to do stripes, or is it a one pass job?”
Mark Every
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