Alternative to Elevators

Quickest way out of the office on TGIF day

Why some employees find it difficult to get up in the morning


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Alternative To Elevators
Captions from our readers...

Nobody could prove it, but it was always suspected that Frank Lloyd Wright's son
may have gotten ahold of his dad's floor plans...

Welcome to The Company. Obviously, the higher you progress up the corporate
ladder, the bigger the perks.

Kirk Lowry


Company dress code: Firm trousers & no high heels.
Taking a small cushion to work is recommended.

Idske Mulder


They weren't built to be water slides, but after the first couple of people slid down,
they became water slides.

Pat Jozefowicz




I figure Chubby is stuck about halfway down again, go get a couple of the seventeen pound
Brunswick's, the purple ones, and move those damn candy machines down to the first floor.

Mark Prairie


Amendment to dress code (due to workers-comp burn claims)...
Skirts are no longer acceptable for employees working on the 2nd floor or above.

Matthew Dollinger


Listen - I'm not saying the company's screwed up, but...
Sue Gosselin


Coming down is okay, but going up is a bitch.
Ed Pellicciotti


After a long days work, the employees get to play for a while to relax them before
they go home. Relieves stress by 97%...

This company changed the 'all work and no play' policy.
Della Norton


These escape slides are just in case Bubba gets into your cell.
Joe Buckner


America's response to the 'Tube'.
Nick Amso


Yea! CEO's get a golden parachute, subordinates get a silver cork screw!
Tom Napoli


MEMO: Once again we must repeat that company rules require that every employee MUST
use the washroom BEFORE descending to the first floor.

Tom Clyne

At last, a simple way round the disability act for getting
wheelchair bound staff out in the event of a fire!

Alison Melrose

Don’t blame me! I TOLD you the guy you hired to design the
emergency escape plan had “State Pen” on his Résumé and NOT “Penn State”.

Fred Piceno


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24-May-2019