Police Gas

Road search for the worst hosers

Quick turnaround from “on petrol” to “on patrol”

Texas police cars are always ready for their next fill-up



Broekn Gas Nozzle dangling from Police Car

QuotaBills
Excitement to riot - Archie Bunker

Not failure, but low aim, is crime. - J. R. Lowell

Marchin' in all the peace riots. - Archie Bunker

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Go pump some neurons. Expand your craniums. - Robin Williams

Behind every great fortune there is a crime. - Honore de Balzac

Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime. - Aristotle

Obviously crime pays, or there'd be no crime. - G. Gordon Liddy

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Stop crime at its source - support planned parenthood. - Robert Byrne

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

Rape is the only crime in which the victim becomes the accused. - Freda Adler

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music. - Vladimir Nabokov

From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-lamp of boredom. - Heinrich Heine

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime. - Ernest Hemingway

It's a proven fact that capital punishment is a well-known detergent to crime. - Archie Bunker

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake

Blind commitment to a theory is not an intellectual virtue: it is an intellectual crime. - Imre Lakatos

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright

A benefit of any job is laughter. It should never be a crime to have fun on the job. It may be a crime not to. - Terry Paulson

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas. - Bill Vaughan

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff

One of the fondest expressions around is that we can't be the world's policeman. But guess who gets called when suddenly someone needs a cop. - General Colin Powell


see also   Police  Section
Gas and Dash
Hoser

 

Redneck Blinds

Louvre Paintings

Egyptian Pyramid Scheme

He Might Wait A Long Time

Dead Poirot

Soldier Tribute

Tulip Snowpath

Refreshing Dump

Hand Speech

Bacon BBQ Table

Cultural Exchange

Eagle Hunt

Dwarf Plane Pull

Music Sudoku Puzzles

Cutex Screwdriver

Eat More Greens Diet

Blinky Thing

Winter in Wyoming

Best Beak Forward

Centaur of Attraction
Submissions by Wayne NowazekFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

29-Mar-2017