Afghan Humour

The Taliban’s national bird


Q: How do you play Taliban bingo?
A: B-52...F-16...B-1...

Q: What is the Taliban’s national bird?
A: Duck

Q: How is Bin Laden like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.

Q: Why does the Afghanistan Navy have glass bottom boats?
A: So they can see their Air Force.

Q: What do Osama Bin Laden and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from.

Q: Why aren’t there any Wal-Marts in Afghanistan?
A. Because there’s a Target on every corner.


QuotaBills
The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? - George Carlin

Skill and confidence are an unconquered army. - George Herbert

The army is the true nobility of our country. - Napoleon III

Love is not love without a violin playing goat. - Julia Roberts

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - Groucho Marx

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

In sports, every day you can be the hero or the goat. - Geoff Stults

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings. - William Blake

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars. - William Westmoreland

Where some states have an army, the Prussian army has a state. - Voltaire

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

A conquering army on the border will not be stopped by eloquence. - Otto von Bismarck

When you aim for perfection, you discover it's a moving target. - George Fisher

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

If you can't sleep do not count the sheep, worship the Shepherd. - Unknown

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

Like the herd animals we are, we sniff warily at the strange one among us. - Loren Eiseley

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. - Arab Proverb

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II

You can't hit a target you cannot see, and you cannot see a target you do not have. - Zig Ziglar

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same. - Stendhal

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return. - Jewish Proverb

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

Moses was the greatest legislator and the commander in chief of perhaps the first liberation army. - Elie Wiesel

We could not understand that there was anything about a bird that could not be built on a larger scale. - Orville Wright

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there. - Will Rogers

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland


see also   Country  &  Nationality  Sections
Afghan Livestock Management
Afghanistan Map - Revised Edition
Miss Afghanistan Finalists

 

Frozen Fish Meal

Stork Exhaust

I 'Saw' An Accident

Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat

Car Surgeon
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23-Feb-2019