The Ig Nobel Awards

Awards for people whose achievements cannot or should not be reproduced

[The Ig Nobel awards, a spoof of the Nobel Awards, have been presented in the U.S. The annual awards, for people whose achievements “cannot or should not be reproduced”, were presented at a spoof ceremony at Harvard University. They are handed out by the science/humour magazine, Annals of Improbable Research, to real academics and others whose work might strike people’s funny bones. Among the winners were…]

• A University College London team who showed the brains of London taxi drivers were different from average people, because they become enlarged in the zone associated with navigation;

• A Japanese researcher was honoured for chemistry for his study of a bronze statue that failed to attract pigeons;

• Kees Moeliker, of Natuurmuseum Rotterdam in the Netherlands, won the biology prize for being the first scientist to record homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck;

• The engineering award went to the late John Paul Stapp, the late Edward A Murphy Jr and George Nichols, for jointly giving birth in 1949 to Murphy’s Law - the basic principle that “if there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, someone will do it”;

• An Australian team won the physics award for their irresistible report “An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces”, published in Applied Ergonomics.

This year’s Ig Nobel Peace Prize was awarded to Indian Lal Bihari for leading an active life even though he had been declared legally dead. The organizers said he’d waged “a lively posthumous campaign” against bureaucracy and greedy relatives. He was also the man behind the Association of Dead People.

Hire character. Train skill. - Peter Schutz

A root is a flower that disdains fame. - Kahlil Gibran

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Happiness is not the end of life; character is. - Henry Ward Beecher

Winning takes talent, to repeat takes character. - John Wooden

What is research but a blind date with knowledge? - Will Harvey

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

Character is a diamond that scratches every other stone. - Cyrus A. Bartol

The real character of a man is found out by his amusements. - Joshua Reynolds

Do what you know and perception is converted into character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man's manner to a certain extent indicates his character. - Samuel Smiles

Extremists think 'communication' means agreeing with them. - Leo Rosten

Unto ourselves our own life is necessary, unto others our character. - St. Augustine

The final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. - Anne Frank

Fame is only good for one thing - they will cash your check in a small town. - Truman Capote

The world may take your reputation from you, but it cannot take your character. - Emma Dunham Kelley

Making mistakes reveals human nature. How one deals with them reveals character. - Unknown

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans. - Ronald Reagan

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

We all lose our looks eventually, better develop your character and interest in life. - Jacqueline Bisset

When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson

Change is an easy panacea. It takes character to stay in one place and be happy there. - Elizabeth Clarke Dunn

Nature magically suits a man to his fortunes, by making them the fruit of his character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research. - Wilson Mizner

Character is better than ancestry, and personal conduct is of more importance than the highest. - Thomas J. Barnardo

Character is, in the long run, the decisive factor in the life of individuals and of nations alike. - Theodore Roosevelt

Most people say that it is the intellect which makes a great scientist. They are wrong: it is character. - Albert Einstein

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. - Bill Vaughan

Don't be accusing me of taking a bribe. You know what they call that, "definition of character." - Archie Bunker

When writing a novel a writer should create living people; people not characters. A character is a caricature. - Ernest Hemingway

Every human being is intended to have a character of his own; to be what no others are, and to do what no other can do. - William Henry Channing

A happy home is one in which each spouse grants the possibility that the other may be right, though neither believes it. - Don Fraser

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

When anyone asks me about the Irish character, I say look at the trees. Maimed, stark and misshapen, but ferociously tenacious. - Unknown

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right path, the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. - Anne Frank

see also  Relationship  Section
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